I recently spent a week exploring a cross section of Texas that included Austin, Houston, and San Antonio, and this is what I learned about the Lone Star State:
GIRLS
As the above diagram illustrates, 75% of the girls in Texas are blonde.* It’s great if you’re into the Barbie aesthetic because that’s what most of the girls there are aiming for. Chicks from Austin are the exception, but they’re simply too hardcore. In Austin it’s common to be rendered stupid by a girl because not only is she a 9, but she has tattoos up to her chin, just finished chugging a bottle of Jim Bean, and is about to light a M-80 at someone’s house party (and in your heart).
*Note: This does not account for Mexican women, who we’ll get to later.
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GUNS
Guns are terrifying and shitloads of fun. Never having been around guns (New York is one of the safest places in the world), going to a shooting range and having dozens of people around you holding instruments of death while shots ring out from every direction is pretty nerve rattling — but after awhile, you get used to it. It also helps that Texans seem totally comfortable with guns. We asked the owner of the range where we could unload a few rounds of a shotgun and he told us, “Yeah, just walk down and to the left. There’s a hill there. I guess you can shoot into that.”
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CARS
Texans drive everywhere all the time. Public transportation exists in some cities to shuttle and frustrate the poor, but most people don’t even consider it an option. Some Texans bike, but outside of the University of Texas students in Austin, they do it recreationally. Oh, and if you’re seen walking, it’s assumed that you’re homeless. Sorry. The plus side of this car-centric culture is that a ton of shit has been converted to be more auto-friendly, leading to ridiculous results like a drive-thru bar.
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BARS
Last call in Texas is 2 AM and it is serious. If you dawdle past that, bartenders toss out your drinks and tell you to get the fuck out. I saw guys who had their just-ordered, barely-sipped beers snatched away and they staggered away without a complaint. In New York that would inspire a “fuck you” at the least, but I guess being pissed over a $7 PBR makes more sense than a $1.50 Lone Star.
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COUNTRY MUSIC
Texans actually listen to country music. Like every other genre of music, 90% of it is rubbish, but if you manage to find a couple of really talented young kids at the local pizzeria / bar / arcade / venue, the country music that they play can be pretty fucking fun.
—
BLACKS
There are no black people in Texas — at least not the parts I was in. During my entire trip, I saw like two. Everyone else was either white or Mexican. The above painting may be the closest I got to a black person but I saw it in some white girl’s mansion, which means it might actually be a portrait of someone from Jersey Shore.
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HUGE HOUSES
Texans have homes like mansions. They have jacuzzis and dining rooms and dens and other things that New Yorkers only see if they go to the movies or make six figures (and maybe not even then). I understand it’s because low population density means cheap space, but it still makes you realize that New Yorkers basically live in closets.
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MEXICAN FOOD
Mexican restaurants in Texas are as ubiquitous as Starbucks in Manhattan. They’re usually cheap and always delicious. Unlike Mexican food in New York, what you find in Texas is mostly Tex-Mex style (duh). This makes the question of whether Mexican food in Texas is better than in New York as ridiculous as asking whether ass or titties are better; they’re both great in their own way, so just dig in.
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MEXICANS
Unfortunately with all that delicious Mexican food comes a ton of Mexicans. Texas is full of fat Mexican metalheads, terrifying Chicano gangsters, and their hoodrat offspring. Most of the women look like the ladies slinging churros beneath the 7 train in Queens. The more attractive ones (relatively speaking) dress like either hookers from LA with their black lip liner and halter tops, or Jersey mallrats who shop at PacSun. At a 2 AM last call, that may make do, but it’s nothing to celebrate.
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WHATABURGER
After Mexican food, the go-to option for stoners or kids with drunk munchies in Texas is Whataburger. It’s basically a fast-food burger joint, but it’s miles ahead of McDonald’s or Burgerking. I don’t know what to say, except it just fucking tastes better. I guess it’s sort of like the In-N-Out Burger of Texas.
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THRIFT STORES
Just like in New York, there are two kinds of thrift stores in Texas: “consignment stores” where someone’s already sifted through the slush pile for you, and actual thrift stores, like Boysville, where you have to sort through the garbage yourself. The former is convenient, but way too expensive; I saw this great Playboy “World Adventurer” shirt, but it was like $25. The latter is trying, but worth it if you have the time. $1 for a white bow tie? Yes, please.
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THE FLEA MARKET
Besides thrift stores, there’s also the flea market. (Note: You may not bring your pet cat, dog, snake, or seal.) There you can find anything from stolen produce to a stolen Marines flag. Or you can buy a stolen rifle, and just steal whatever else you want yourself.
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SNUGGIES
Every household in Texas owns at least one Snuggie. The only problem they see with it is that it wasn’t invented sooner.
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STATE PRIDE
Texans fucking LOVE Texas. Their state pride makes Quebec separatism look like a disinterested hobby. I saw — no bullshit — probably a hundred times more Texas flags than U.S. ones. The car dealership in the photo above probably had a couple hundred state flags (you can’t see it in the picture, but each car had a small Texas flag stuck in the windshield wiper) and one U.S. flag standing flaccid in the corner. Texas pride also manifests in all sorts of other random shit, like bags, chips, cookies, crackers, pancakes, shirts, and tissues.
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Y’ALL
Almost everyone in Texas says “y’all” and after three days there, so will you. The only native Texans who don’t say it seem to be the ones who have spent time living out of state, where they were instantly, savagely ridiculed as rednecks if they uttered the contraction. But what do the haters know? Texas is fucking awesome.
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Lame.
01.18.10 at 12:35 pm
Texas is totally rad.
01.18.10 at 12:49 pm
i miss whataburger taquitos so bad and i just got lectured by my stupid california girlfriend about how they aren’t actually taquitos and lord it took all of my texan strength to not beat her
01.18.10 at 12:59 pm
My whole family is from Texas and I fucking love it there. Even though I was slightly scandalized by your overt Mexican-hatin’, I loved the hilarious and totally intentional pun on “Jim Beam.” Beaners suck!
01.18.10 at 1:01 pm
Texas is the best place on Earth. Copenhagen is kinda cool. You got alot of shit wrong though. Mexican food is waaaayyyy better in Texas. and the mexican chicks down there are smokin. this did make me miss Texas as fuck
01.18.10 at 1:03 pm
Everyone from New York would move to Austin tomorrow if it wasn’t an oven for 6 months of the year. I love Texas but I hate being on fire.
01.18.10 at 1:04 pm
BTW that is not a Marine flag, it’s some kind of Army thing, Marines don’t wear berets.
01.18.10 at 1:12 pm
arv, your a cum guzzling retard. this is fucking stupid.
01.18.10 at 1:25 pm
this format. every state please
01.18.10 at 1:40 pm
This article may be proof that relentless Arv hate will actually inspire him to write better.
01.18.10 at 1:42 pm
Sooooooo, Texas is exactly like Florida?
01.18.10 at 1:56 pm
Arv,
You are a fucking retard. Mexican food in NYC sucks a huge giant shit covered cock compared to the Mexican food in Texas (and anywhere else in the southwest for that matter). Additionally, Latina ladies are great because when you are fucking them they will all be like, “Ayyyy Papi!”, which makes me feel like a rapper or something.
01.18.10 at 2:03 pm
OMG, in the third picture down, the guy is holding a Kel-Tec PLR-16. AWESOME! They shoot .223 ammo and are fun as shit to fire.
http://www.kel-tec-cnc.com/plr16.htm
01.18.10 at 2:04 pm
they sell the whataburger ketchup label on a t-shirt, which i saw for the first time when i went home to houston for xmas. i effing miss that place (whataburger and houston). but yes, it is an oven, but no, there a a gajillion black people, where did you go?
01.18.10 at 2:04 pm
the hot tub pic was the saddest thing i’ve ever seen. it must have been filled with the tears of god.
01.18.10 at 2:05 pm
Wow. You went to Texas and ate some fast food? Really? They had bars and girls there? That’s interesting.
Did you brush your teeth this morning? Can’t wait for the blog!
01.18.10 at 2:06 pm
Texans are morons. We had a class debate in history class in 8th grade and this kid from Texas took the pro-slavery point. He was really into it and honestly was disappointed that we didn’t think it was a workable idea. He probably went home and told his dad and he called us kids “a buncha dang commure-nists”. HAHAHA
PS, that food looks like shit.
01.18.10 at 2:16 pm
Toast has to go to Texoose in March so I am glad to read this Texas for Dummies with photos catalog of knowledge. Thanks for the info.
yeehaww
01.18.10 at 2:41 pm
That was awesome, I love Texas got family over there. I also nearly fucked my Texan cousin.I still beat off to that moment, maybe we can catch up in 2010.
01.18.10 at 3:02 pm
@ Zippy
Yeah sure, a state of 30-ish million people has an moron, so what?
This site has a ton of idiots posting on it everyday but I still read.
01.18.10 at 3:03 pm
*24 million
01.18.10 at 3:07 pm
This is so fucking boring. I don’t need fast food, thrift stores, country music or blonds explained to me. Has Arv ever been out of NYC? Very little of this was uniquely Texan. Little turd needs a crash course in AMERICA.
01.18.10 at 3:09 pm
“the hot tub pic was the saddest thing i’ve ever seen. it must have been filled with the tears of god.”
hahaha, well said! thought so too.
but seriously, this article makes me think that the comments about new yorkers not getting out much aren’t jokes. you goons never get out of nyc and see the rest of the country, or world, do you? no wonder the views here tend to be so myopic.
hey, next travel to chicago and talk about how the lakes look like oceans and the midwesterners are so easygoing. fascinating shit.
01.18.10 at 3:11 pm
What´s wrong with mexicans, Apu?? I think you´been cheated with a big dick beaner, pussy
01.18.10 at 3:26 pm
lots of blondes. yes. few blacks. yes. car culture. yes. but seriously got to stand up for the mex food. if you want good mex food in new york its at a nice restaurant that tries to fancy up interior mexican style. in texas it is cheap just about everywhere and way more real. also, at least in austin, there is a huge amount of food carts popping up everywhere the last couple of years. everything from sushi and korean bbq to straight up bbq and soul food and lots of creative veggie type stands too but if find mexican food stand it is basically verbatim interior mexico in a trailor being served to you for prices that would make you think its the 70s or something.
01.18.10 at 3:27 pm
Texas is fun. Whataburger is the shit. There are black people there.
01.18.10 at 3:43 pm
Silly little mongoose taped up a snakes mouth and practiced giving head on it.
01.18.10 at 3:43 pm
Texas IS just like Florida minus the Jimmy Buffett enthusiasts.
01.18.10 at 4:13 pm
What’s the difference between a swap meet and a flea market?
01.18.10 at 4:17 pm
I don’t say yall….but I do love what-a-burger and take great care of my pet seal!!
01.18.10 at 4:24 pm
eugh. a nyc d bag visits Texas. Big whoop. Can I be the Texan that writes a stupid blog about a shopping spree at Brooklyn Industries? That’s like, yall’s flea market rite?? That’s where I can find stolen Old Navy sweat shirts, RITE?? Yeah so same thang.
Only two black people? Oh, sure. Okay yeah Austin and San Antonio are pretty much dominated by Mexican sushi chefs but didn’t you know that Houston isn’t Houston anymore? Thank God for SCREWSTON!
01.18.10 at 4:52 pm
The first photo is the exit I use to go to work. As boring as that is, it was the best part of this boring article on a non-boring place.
01.18.10 at 4:56 pm
Jesus Christ can this website run anything without it being at least partially racist?
01.18.10 at 5:29 pm
The guy on the left in the hot-tub pic has a penis growing out of his knee
01.18.10 at 5:33 pm
have you ever left NYC? were you visiting a fellow high schooler to come to the understanding of texas that you did?
just curious as this is the worst texas review in the history of the great nation of texas.
get fucked you marmaduke.
01.18.10 at 6:25 pm
texas if freakin allsome.
01.18.10 at 6:32 pm
Nice work,every-one usually seems to be so afraid of looking like they care about what they are posting. You see even Arv can do something good when he puts a little effort into it.
ps:You and the half-breed should still kill yourselves.
01.18.10 at 6:34 pm
don’t forget the drive through churches!
01.18.10 at 6:35 pm
rhis rhas exactly actually funny.. er maybe just good. good worky derk, arvin
keep up the good werky dork
nah this shit was actually exactly informational and good to know, !
01.18.10 at 6:42 pm
I mean, its one thing to go to Texas and tell all your snotty East Coast friends about how the exotic things you saw like a reasonable Cost of Living Index or Mexicans, but its an entirely different thing to understand what the fuck you saw.
No black people in Texas? You dumb asshole, read something:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_by_African-American_population
4th largest total black population behind New York, Florida and Georgia. Go to fuckin’ South Houston or South Dallas or the Golden Triangle or East Fort Worth and pull your self-righteous dick out of your own slopppy mouth and meet some of the nice black people and eat some BBQ. How the fuck did you go to Texas and not mention BBQ once? What a fuckin idiot.
01.18.10 at 7:07 pm
I mean, its one thing to go to Texas and tell all your snotty East Coast friends about all the exotic things you saw like a reasonable Cost of Living Index or Mexicans, but its an entirely different thing to understand what the fuck you saw.
No black people in Texas? You dumb asshole, read something:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_by_African-American_population
4th largest total black population behind New York, Florida and Georgia. Go to fuckin’ South Houston or South Dallas or the Golden Triangle or East Fort Worth and pull your self-righteous dick out of your own slopppy mouth and meet some of the nice black people and eat some BBQ. How the fuck did you go to Texas and not mention BBQ once? What a fuckin idiot.
01.18.10 at 7:08 pm
You forgot the favorite Texan past time of ass raping livestock.
Every Texan has joined in the fun at least once.
01.18.10 at 7:32 pm
He wasn’t saying they don’t have blacks.
He was just saying , they keep those disagreeable blacks out of sight.
01.18.10 at 7:35 pm
“dick.shit Says:
@ Zippy
Yeah sure, a state of 30-ish million people has an moron, so what?”
Actuallly, at least two morons. Didn’t W. Bush move back there?
01.18.10 at 8:20 pm
So your first few points were right on but then it went to shit; I’m guessing because you really just spent most of your time in these cities going to faggy hipster parties sucking blow up your nose and listening to Vampire Weekend blaring over their fathers speaker systems. There are plenty of black people all over the place here, many of the Mexicans are just as legit as the whites, and yeah, Real Mexican food is just as abundant as tex-mex, even more so once you count all the local places in the barrios. Who gives a fuck about fast food and fucking snuggies though? Seriously this shit got boring fast. But we do all say ya’ll, and much to my disgrace we do have more state-pride than New Jersey has Gay-Pride. But we got that too, ya know. It’s called Montrose (that’s in Houston, the largest city in the states to have an openly gay mayor.)
01.18.10 at 8:57 pm
New York doesn’t have Whataburger?
01.18.10 at 9:31 pm
Arv, I´ll fuck you in the ass… I hope you like cubans
01.18.10 at 9:32 pm
arv my texan comrade had this to say about your little visit. he wishes to remain anonymous.
So, “ARV,” where to begin?
I could start swinging at the basic premise, which is that there’s anything particularly interesting about what some knob from New York thinks of my home state. Teenage girls can take pictures of old barns and homeless people and think that they’re “saying” “something.” And 16-year-olds from New York can come to Texas and drive around a bit and think that they’ve got a handle on the zeitgeist.
What, you’re not 16? hmmm. Maybe whoever suffered your presence here (for a whole week, fuck me) was 16. Because that’s the vibe I’m getting off your incredibly lazy travelogue. Looks like you had a good ol’ time hanging out with the fake ID crowd.
Let’s talk ethnicity. You don’t like Mexicans? Or is it Hispanic people in general you don’t like? You love the food, but you don’t like the people? Bummer. You didn’t see any black people? Um.
So … you came to Texas, and you hung out with some rich kids, and you went to some bars, and you drank some beer, and you ate some pizza, and you were scared of Mexicans and scared of Austin rocker chicks, and your hosts were apparently so afraid of black people that they kept you at a safe distance from any. And then you got to go to a flea market, and some resale shops. And handle a gun.
I know your whole post is all part of a sort of strained hipster irony thing, where the whole point is that you went somewhere and you had a few experiences, and then you claim (ironically, still) that you have some insight, even though you probably know that you don’t know shit. And that’s okay, because you’re from New York. And that’s supposed to make it funny–look at the hinterlands, everybody, they talk different.
Honestly, it’s played. It’s not witty. It’s not insightful. It’s not even functionally funny. You’re no different from a tourist who went to New York and saw a show and went to the hard rock cafe and said he knew the city.
The nicest thing about Texas is that you came here and a bunch of people tolerated you–even the rocker chicks. They probably mostly refrained from laughing in your face. Most Texans wouldn’t laugh in your face, see. They’d wait until you got the fuck out of town, and then they’d make a goddamned running gag out of you. Stay home next time, fuckstick.
01.18.10 at 10:59 pm
TEX-ASS SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARV RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
01.18.10 at 11:50 pm
and he got shit pushed in behind a whataburger…hence his love of texas.
01.18.10 at 11:51 pm
I thought MARINES had bad tattoos. Then I went to Austin. I saw a girl with a full Mayan sleeve rolling up to her neck. She was a crustie with dreads riding on a fixie. Ew.
01.18.10 at 11:53 pm
By the way, New York is below any league for Mexican food not only to Texas but the Southwest in general, especially California.
01.19.10 at 12:00 am
When I read the “Texans drive everywhere all the time.” part, you make it seem so bizaare. Almost every state has people driving to places they need to go to.
New York City is a CITY…where public trans is a must.
DUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
01.19.10 at 12:02 am
do texans google “texas” every morning and this is what happened to come up today? then they all felt the need to comment “this makes me mad!”
…what it must be like to be stupid and angry. texas would be better without texans. warren moon was the shit though… also, he was a black guy. thats ironic right? like your goddamn shitty blogblahhipsterblahblah…
did that dude call arv a marmaduke? amazing. so great to hear texans call an indian (?) guy racist. then they say arv is lucky they tolerated him. holy shit. and they all agree in the end that texas is awesome. holy shit.
wow am i stoned.
and johnny makeup almost made me puke, right after i finished beating off
01.19.10 at 12:18 am
“I know your whole post is all part of a sort of strained hipster irony thing, where the whole point is that you went somewhere and you had a few experiences, and then you claim (ironically, still) that you have some insight, even though you probably know that you don’t know shit. And that’s okay, because you’re from New York. And that’s supposed to make it funny–look at the hinterlands, everybody, they talk different.
Honestly, it’s played. It’s not witty. It’s not insightful. It’s not even functionally funny. You’re no different from a tourist who went to New York and saw a show and went to the hard rock cafe and said he knew the city.”
Pretty much.
01.19.10 at 12:55 am
If there are no black people in Texas, then please explain COPS to me, cause every episode in Houston had a disproportionate amount of black people in it, and they weren’t the cops.
01.19.10 at 1:10 am
Jesus look at all this Texan pride from others. Now that is amazing. Can’t get that in NYC, you also can’t get slamming Mexican food.
Ugh! What’s with that snuggie fulgy looking biatch? She looks Mexican – eww.
01.19.10 at 1:37 am
THIRD COAST
01.19.10 at 3:39 am
Lets all go to texas and take over that shit!
01.19.10 at 4:12 am
@imyar
you are a terminal of opinion for people who invest themselves way too much in what arv says. Why? this is already anonymous? You are a piece of bitch. And you’re opinion doppelganger sounds like a bitch.
01.19.10 at 4:51 am
Raymi, that was an idiotic thing to do. Great post Arv.
01.19.10 at 6:18 am
Like it has been said before, Mexican food in Texas is better than NY. Tacos al Pastor at Maria’s Taco Express – put ya lightas up!
01.19.10 at 6:56 am
Mr. Racial Percentages is butting in here to declare that Houston is only 1% less black than NYC. That’s from a study conducted from 2005-2007, so it may or may not count the Katrina evacuees.
Your friends were merely protecting you, Arv. Stay away from the Fifth Ward. They have one-eyed dwarf rappers down there.
01.19.10 at 7:09 am
@ann richards – MEXICAN SUSHI CHEFS – I moved to North Carolina and I was in dire need of a sushi restaurant with REAL asian people and said I’d even settle for a mexican sushi chef. @salad – UM, WHAT? and @Jim Goad – NO may have called Katrina a hurricane but Houston called that shit an eclipse! WHUT!?
01.19.10 at 9:02 am
Texas is divine and you are 100% right about everything you said here (except the snuggies, as far as I know, but I overlooked it since you linked Late Night Pie)
PLZ do part 2 and have it made up entirely of Texas tattoos
01.19.10 at 9:34 am
what the fuck is wrong with you?
yeah, there are no black people in Texas. you would get your ass kicked so fucking hard in houston that you would never leave your insulated hipster cave again.
also, everything else you wrote reads like a 7th graders field trip to Austin.
fuck you, you dumb motherfucker.
01.19.10 at 10:42 am
Yeah, you must have stayed in the white bread parts of Houston to say there were no black people. And you missed out on their biggest cultural exports, which would be Screw and Lean. Until you have downed a bottle of promethazine and listened to rap that has been slowed down to sound like a Satanic church sermon, you have not experienced the best that city has to offer.
01.19.10 at 10:45 am
I’m from London and did a year at UT,
Texas seems nice. I saw loads of black people as well though.
01.19.10 at 10:56 am
…maybe somebody already mentioned it- i’m not going to sift through the tower of alphanumeric diarrhea, but you’ve got a serious deficit in the Jesus/Bible-thumper category, you clueless little coastal/overpriveleged shitstain.
01.19.10 at 11:03 am
im sorry if my anonymous friend has hurt arv’s feelings. i am nowhere close to eloquent (not my opinions) and i do not care how cool/not cool texas is, you can have a good time anywhere.
01.19.10 at 11:42 am
Raymi’s friend is the one who sounds 16. Only youths sit around thinking they’re better than slightly younger people.
01.19.10 at 1:36 pm
G-D i’m sorry i meant to say that HE (the paki) got his shit pushed in!
01.19.10 at 2:00 pm
NO BLACK PEOPLE IN TEXAS? I PROMISE YOU AN AVERAGE TEXAN WOULD HAVE TRIPLE THE AMOUNT OF BLACK PEOPLE IN THEIR CELL PHONE THAN ANYONE FROM NEW YORK.
01.19.10 at 2:13 pm
Stop pretending to be magnanimous. “Oooh look, I’m not one of you pussy intellectuals from up North. Texas is greeeeaaaaat!” We all know that Texas is a fucked up petro-state full of complete idiots. God, I wish it would just disappear.
Then again, I’m Canadian and feel this way about most of your shitty country, including most of New York.
01.19.10 at 2:23 pm
newp dude’s a geezer.
01.19.10 at 3:43 pm
all my exes live in texas…
and that’s why i lay my hat in…
greenock?
01.19.10 at 4:34 pm
Houston has the nations largest Nigerian population in the US. Shitters. And what about the 5th Ward Boyz. And the Geto Boys? And Devin the dude. I think the main reason we don’t all move down there is that Austin is the only tolerable place and they still lynch fags. So no scarves allowed. That’s two reasons. Plus the heat. Guns rock though.
01.19.10 at 5:39 pm
@Jim Goad Bushwick Bill is from Brooklyn
01.19.10 at 7:12 pm
Well, imdb.com says he was born in Kingston, Jamaica but lived in Brooklyn for a while. I’ve been to the Bushwick section of Brooklyn—well, the jail, at least, in 1987. Either way, I’m pretty sure Bushwick Bill was in Houston when he was in the Geto Boys.
Back during my Golden Days of Wiggerdom, I interviewed Bushwick Bill and Scarface over the telephone—I was in LA and they were in Houston. Bushwick was all about “the Jesus” even back then. Remember, this is a one-eyed dwarf who was rapping about slitting bitches from their throat to their pussy…and committing suicide…and pulling violent, strong-arm bank robberies. When he mentioned that Jesus was his savior, I said, “Oh, is this a recent thing?” He said, “No, I’ve been that way my whole life.”
Black spirituality is truly a thing of wonder.
01.19.10 at 8:27 pm
A lesser-known entity in the long, glorious tradition of Houston Dwarf Rap was “Too Much Trouble,” also known as “The Baby Geto Boys.” Their dwarf, named Bar-None, was of the Caucasian Persuasion:
http://tr.im/babygeto
01.19.10 at 8:36 pm
I thought a female wrote this.
01.19.10 at 8:38 pm
…i was interviewing some religious figures this one time, you know, popes, priests, what have you, they were a little drunk and telling me all about smallpox-blankets and burning witches, holy wars and buggering little boys, amongst other frivolities, and i thought to myself, white spirituality is truly a thing of wonder.
nice one on The Baby Geto Boys though.
01.19.10 at 8:47 pm
i want to fight arv.
01.19.10 at 10:19 pm
the only way to survive Austin summers is by drinking glasses of bourbon out of the freezer, seriously. That’s how I lived through it without using air conditioning.
You got it wrong on the blacks and Mexicans. Houston has a ton of black people, and the black people in Austin are on the Eastside, around Rosewood and 12th and north of that. The projects on Poquito and Rosewood have a lot of black people (I used to live across from there! Negro youth would throw stones at me or try to sell me crack as I’d ride my bike, and I’d yell insults at them!)
You missed Dallas. Dallas has some attractive well dressed Hispanic girls in Oak Cliff. Dallas is the worst in Texas when it comes to the Barbie thing with white ladies, but there’s some good here and there. My fiancee was born there! And North Oak Cliff and Greenville Ave have some cool stuff.
01.19.10 at 10:53 pm
Oh yeah Houston has a big Black Panther history… totally a black city, as is Dallas to a certain degree. Austin and San Antonio are more Hispanic.
Arv is spot on on the gun deal in Texas. It’s a bummer that the ATF is now trying to crack down on legal private gun sales in Texas.
01.19.10 at 10:59 pm
Texan killed me with “get fucked you marmaduke”
Hire that guy to write for this site.
PS, nyc mexican food is poison. Even Chicago has infinitely better mex.
01.21.10 at 1:29 am
Dude. NYC mexican food is a joke, shit gives me the vomits just thinking about it.
01.23.10 at 5:44 pm
You have obviously never been to dallas, you cannot stop in a Ross or even a coffee shop without having half of the people there from different countries…from indian, black, asain, middle eastern, african, etc. So, come take a friendly visit to Dallas, I will show you around.
01.24.10 at 4:02 pm
ALSO, In oak cliff, if you step there you will get shot, I highly suggest you not go there hahaha.
I am mexican and puertorican, And I do not dress like a fucking chula.
01.24.10 at 4:08 pm