My nerd curiosity got the best of me when I heard this art rock band Xiu Xiu put out a new single that uses a Nintendo DS to make the synth sounds. What I ended up nerding out on was a video with a cute girl making herself vomit.

Egad. All I wanted was to hear how musicians are trying to incorporate the Korg DS-10 into popular music. Now I have this video laser-beamed into my brain for the rest of my life. How can / why do some women subject themselves to such adamant self-abuse? I tried to make myself vomit after a barbecue once using the two finger method and I could not bring myself to do it. Perhaps if I accidentally drank a pint of Drain-O I’d have the motivation to pull it off, but not with delirious meat sweats and a gut bursting with beer and brisket. It is sheer agony. The fingers go in the mouth, blood rushes to the face, eyes tear and bulge, and then, hooray, you get to throw up — which is the most taxing and damaging bodily function we’ve got. Sheer fucking agony.

Why sweethearts, why? Don’t hate your bodies. We men don’t. You wouldn’t believe what body ratios make our pee-pees throb with blood. Please don’t go dark on us. Stop it, it’s insane. The girl in Xiu Xiu was a certified spank magnet but now I’d avoid her like the plague. There is no doubt in my mind that I would rather have “fat & fun” over “thin & miserable” any day of the year. We love you, pumpkins. Please stop. :(

-MIKE EIDE

  1. DID YOU KNOW… (ROCK MUSIC EDITION)
  2. BULIMIA WORKS
  3. ARE YOU TIRED OF BEING A PIECE OF SHIT?
  4. TV CARNAGE: SANTA CLAUSE KILLED IN DISCO SPEARING!
  5. DRUNK STORIES: “THERE WAS BLOOD EVERYWHERE”

This entry was posted on 02.08.10 at 12:28 pm by Mike Eide. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.
19 Comments
  1. milky Says:

    send some of you guys who like fat and fun chicks my way, JUST SAYINNNN


  2. UNCLEDADDY Says:

    HEY! Nobody said FAT, lady.


  3. just a cunt hair away Says:

    milky- what’s your number?


  4. syan reacrest Says:

    I don’t know what you mean, that is like the best music video I’ve seen since Fiona Apple.


  5. Anonymous Says:

    vomiting is hot. fuck fat people


  6. just a cunt hair away Says:

    Anonymous Says:
    vomiting is hot. fuck fat people

    THAT’S WHAT I’M TRYING TO DO!!!


  7. OOO Says:

    That is a lot of cum


  8. Cool Face Says:

    I love it, beautiful. I wish to incorporate women throwing up in my next live show!


  9. flickin'beans Says:

    fun and sassy!


  10. Canadave Says:

    If you ever drink Drain-O, don’t make yourself vomit. It burns worse on the way up, and then you have no esophagus left. DON’T BELIEVE THE LYE.


  11. MTVemployee Says:

    put the “drive your prius fast” or whatever it was post back up, i went to read it right as you took it down and thats fucking annoying.


  12. kure kure takora Says:

    xiu xiu is one of those bands you listen to for half a year to get “arty” chicks before you give up on that shit and go back to whatever you listen to before because your dick starts to rot off from their pretentious bullshit.


  13. jj Says:

    elegant


  14. MaltLikkaSippa Says:

    i like how the nigga beside her is eating a chocolate bar…


  15. goddamnit Says:

    I really don’t wanna believe that girls over 18 and working outside the fashion/entertainment industry do this shit.


  16. slicks Says:

    you sir are a faggot


  17. Rerun Says:

    Ten Kittens.


  18. Anonymous Says:

    I can’t believe I just subjected myself to that. The terrible music, I mean.


  19. shadowy figure Says:

    Looks like somebody’s heard of Martin Creed…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AYIf3nHNxY&feature=related

    (Spoiler: this particular chick can’t do it, but seems cute as hell.)


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