[Photo procured by me, not Lesley - Ed]
Dear Barf,
When is it okay to cheat? I have a friend who’s married and she says, “Unless you’re married, it doesn’t count.” She says if she could go back in time she would have cheated way more before marriage because after that, it’s off the books. Is that true? What if you’re living with the guy?
Dear Dummy,
It’s okay to cheat when it’s not called cheating. It’s okay to cheat when you’re under the age of 21. I’m pretty sure that’s it. If you’re in an open relationship (I call bullshit on those, btw) then it’s not called cheating. If you’re in a committed relationship, married or not, and you cheat and you don’t tell your significant other, then you not only “cheated,” but you also “lied.” You really needed to ask ME of all people this question? If you don’t feel guilty about the cheating or lying, it doesn’t make it okay, it just means you’re a sociopath. You can try to rationalize or spin it however you want in order to sleep at night, but in the long run, trust me, you are fucked.
Love
Lesley Ericha Arfin
Leave a Reply
Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.
Bad Behavior has blocked 4710 access attempts in the last 7 days.
Arfin, you look gorgeous!
11.21.08 at 10:13 am
10s!
11.21.08 at 10:33 am
That picture doesn’t really make up for the crappy writing and/or advice, but look at butterlegs on the left! Marrone!!!
11.21.08 at 10:36 am
I would say sociopaths are those who don’t feel guilt or remorse at all, ever. Not those who feel guilt and remorse, just not enough to curtail their cheating (yet). (I said “feel” not “show outwardly” or whatever.)
In my experience most guys cheat. But that might only be a twenties thing. That life affirming bit Gavin put in his anti-heroin post seems about right, even if I’m not at that stage myself.
11.21.08 at 10:43 am
holy moly – good lordy!
11.21.08 at 10:47 am
you look the best! i mean as far as effort goes.
11.21.08 at 11:12 am
obviously human beings are not manogamous by nature. And you can totally get away with it if you are in the right situation. Just tell that little voice in the back of you head to shut up because thats not your consious, thats you brainwashed brain echoing what society has told you is right, it is not the way it was ment to be. you will eventually relearn how to just be normal. Just don’t tell anybody, not evryone is that enlightined.
11.21.08 at 11:25 am
Pippy, your education is defective. Did you keep the receipt?
11.21.08 at 11:35 am
the chick on the right looks like a carnie, the chick on the left has kind of a douchey face, but the chick in the middle is mint.
11.21.08 at 11:57 am
Street Boning… shut the fuck up.
11.21.08 at 12:06 pm
I title this picture “Hanger On”
11.21.08 at 12:11 pm
N – ‘In my experience most guys cheat.’
Shit. I’d cheat on you, just for saying that. Maybe it’s you? Have you ever thought about that? Have you? Have you? Have you? Have you?
11.21.08 at 12:16 pm
Was the dummy with the question named Mongo?
11.21.08 at 12:43 pm
I think it’s Terry Richardson’s lady.
11.21.08 at 12:56 pm
Atheist:
I am a guy. I said all that cause I have cheated and so have most of my friends/peers.
11.21.08 at 1:10 pm
barfin is the one you try to hit on cause the other girls are too hot.
11.21.08 at 1:55 pm
If most guys cheat, they’re cheating with a very small handful of women or it’s likely that most women cheat, too.
11.21.08 at 2:43 pm
Hey, just saying, every body needs sex along with water & air.
11.21.08 at 3:36 pm
I hate this.
11.21.08 at 4:24 pm
no-one looks good in the reflected glow of a nissan sentra’s right tail-light and that goes double for “mannenquin 3″ on the left there
11.21.08 at 9:35 pm
I wasn’t looking forward to opening this article because I was expecting some hipster nonsense about how its actually cool to cheat these days, but a completely rational, sensible but still entertaining answer came through.. good work 7/10 article rating
11.21.08 at 11:06 pm
yeah i thought you did well on this one Garfin (Garfield & Arfin put together)
People who say shit like “human being aren’t monogamous by nature” are dumb and need to check out such animals like: penguins, albatrosses, birds, and other such creatures of that nature.
penguins and stuff mate for life and so do lots of cool people, so the cynicism should –> out the door
11.24.08 at 9:46 pm
I fucking can’t bring myself to cheat, but godamn I wish I could sometimes. It seems like I wouldn’t enjoy the sex anyhow becuase I’d be so riddled with guilt.
11.25.08 at 3:56 pm