I made a lot of mistakes with my first child, mostly because I didn’t know how to discipline a baby. That “is what it is” and there’s no going back. Fine. With my second child however, I was a lot more careful. I nipped almost all bad behavior in the bud and now, so can you. I am finally ready to impart everything I’ve learned to other Super Dads out there. Here’s how to punish your newborn for everything from having a messy room, to taking the car without permission, to stealing.
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STREET BONER 1127
Being straight edge as a kid is a great way to rebel against: Puking, getting pregnant, and wrapping your parent’s car around a tree.
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I lol’d
01.23.09 at 1:06 pm
haha I loved this, good work, cute baby
01.23.09 at 1:17 pm
Beauty.
01.23.09 at 1:22 pm
not so funny. you think that it’s funny because you have a close relationship with your kids. if you were able to take a step back you would see that the video is lame.
01.23.09 at 1:27 pm
America would be a better place if fathers enforced this sort of strict discipline.
01.23.09 at 1:32 pm
Fantastic. I want a Dr Spock book from Gavin so I know which way is up with my first born.
01.23.09 at 1:36 pm
Is that normal, that they let the guy keep the kid in this sort of situation? i mean, I can’t imagine Gavin has ever had sex outside of date rape, so is it normal for the courts to award him custody?
01.23.09 at 1:37 pm
Gavin is a DILF.
01.23.09 at 1:43 pm
great vid – already tried the two finger spank technique on my gf and it really is just the right amount of pressure, tried it on my other roomate and she agrees too
01.23.09 at 1:47 pm
Babies are dangerous and they must be stopped. this video has been very helpful. i look forward to a future of obedient toddlers who respect the law of super dad’s like GM.
01.23.09 at 2:20 pm
too long. learn to edit.
man… gavin… you have to be the star soooo bad dont you.
01.23.09 at 2:34 pm
racist
01.23.09 at 2:45 pm
he seemed rawtha indignant that the whole neighborhood labelled the child
but he needs to accept responsibility for how the child has turned out too
bad parent!
01.23.09 at 2:47 pm
if you feed your kids meat and milk Sophie will go into puberty prematurely because of all the feminine hormones in milk. Duncan will emulate the act of culinary violence by being violent to little small animals. Both will develop diets very bad for them, and they will be less intelligent, sensitive, and creative people–not to mention with serious problems ranging from addiction to cancer.
Feeding your kids meat is child abuse. You know one of them is going to ask you “Daddy why do we eat animals?” and you’re going to really have to bullshit your way through that one. Why not do them a favor and look into the issue?
01.23.09 at 2:53 pm
shape up or ship out. They have a place for miscreants like her, it’s called the big house.
01.23.09 at 3:01 pm
vegan jules….suck it and fuck off with your bullshit. i eat veal and other baby animals.
when the fuck did gavin have another kid?
01.23.09 at 3:01 pm
Kawaiiiiiiiiii SUPACUUUUTE
01.23.09 at 3:09 pm
This is funny because a) babies are funny and b) lying is funny. Duh.
01.23.09 at 3:14 pm
i heard gavins adopted
01.23.09 at 3:22 pm
the best part is how the swear words were fake bleeped out. you could totally still hear them!!!
also, yeah. veal is the real deal.
01.23.09 at 3:29 pm
love this!
01.23.09 at 3:35 pm
babies are basically mini-retards
01.23.09 at 3:44 pm
Haha, that was great.
01.23.09 at 4:01 pm
those kids are cute as hell
01.23.09 at 4:22 pm
MY FUCKING HILARIOUS GOD GAVIN. SO GOOD.
01.23.09 at 6:17 pm
YOUR SON WAS SMILING AFTER RECEIVING HIS SPANKING. THAT IS THE TOTALLY WRONG REACTION. I HATE TO BE THE ONE TO TELL YOU THIS (MAYBE GET A SECOND MEDICAL OPINION?) BUT YOUR KID MIGHT BE RETARDED.
01.23.09 at 6:18 pm
Gavin lives off Bedford? I knew he lived here but I didn’t know he chose such an obvious spot. Anyway, Duncan is sooo adorable
01.23.09 at 6:24 pm
the beginning! hahaha!
01.23.09 at 6:25 pm
This was really fucking hilarious. Like, Really.
A) The McInnes children are retardedly adorable
B) This makes me want to have kids just so I too can abuse them in the most jocular of ways
C) I get the feeling dude is actually probs a super dad
01.23.09 at 8:24 pm
HOLY SHIT
I just watched it a second time. I didn’t get that it said “THIEF” on his fucking head. I am DYING.
01.23.09 at 9:24 pm
excellent.
01.23.09 at 9:30 pm
dropping sophie at the beginning was hilarious……….just from that alone I knew it was going to be a good video
01.23.09 at 11:38 pm
dude, are u aware how dope as fuck you look with your hair that length?
01.24.09 at 2:41 am
Those kids got it so good.
01.24.09 at 4:51 am
@ vegan jules; sorry, technically you aren’t vegan.
eating dick kind of goes against everything you’re about.
01.24.09 at 9:32 am
Next Week on TGiF, a new episode of GAVIN RULES! America’s Most Unlikely Disciplinarian dishes out the RULES . . . with hilarious results! Keep it dialed to ABC!
01.24.09 at 10:25 am
Post this on YouTube and a gar-on-tee that it will make the front page.
01.24.09 at 12:27 pm
love this! duncan is precious
01.24.09 at 1:45 pm
haha gavin has a land rover
01.24.09 at 2:54 pm
L-O-fuckin’-L. “It’s too late, that’s a bad kid.” Also, that’s a sweet as hell rec room or whatever, with that wall that’s like a big photograph of ferns.
01.24.09 at 3:56 pm
You a rich sumbitch.
01.24.09 at 5:48 pm
Still swangin.
01.24.09 at 7:08 pm
it great that your strict on your kids when they break the laws of man and everything, but maybe just not let them listen to rap. wouldn’t that be the ultimate nipping of buds?
01.24.09 at 10:03 pm
That is too funny. Keep up the vids.
01.25.09 at 4:10 pm
i can’t believe no one has said anything about the skull pillows. skull pillows?!?! seriously?!?!?
01.25.09 at 7:18 pm
ha ha ha ha, skull pillows, no shit!
01.25.09 at 8:51 pm
Gavin, the hate and anger wasn’t coming across strong enough in your performance. I could feel glimmers of love for your children. Next time try envisioning them wearing brown tights and that should help the anger flow more naturally.
01.25.09 at 10:42 pm
omfg this is Hilarious
01.26.09 at 1:03 am
Oh so you like your kids and you wanted to show us your house. That’s nice. Go document more of your coke habit for your kids to watch in the future.
01.26.09 at 5:55 am
OK Redneck is jellz, so cute!
01.26.09 at 10:46 am
i hate everything and everyone but even i loooooooooved this video, cute kids, great script, awesome altogether. but im getting over a cold so when i belly-laugh it sounds like a bingo-mom guffawing through her benson and hedges. i especially loved cussing out the baby and him just laughing, hilarious!
ps why does everyone who links their blog here, have a shitty blog that tries to bite vice/SBTVC style, that never gets any comments and probably any hits? seriously it is a mystery. someone here MUST write a blog that isn’t about “pithy” “social commentary”, that isn’t shitty, that at least one other person actually reads.
01.26.09 at 11:38 am
ROR!
01.26.09 at 12:49 pm
Are the McInnes babies whaaaassians!?! kawwaiii explosions!!!
LOL @ Duncan smiling at getting reprimanded, especially at the spanking part. Kid is kinda kinky
01.26.09 at 3:14 pm
WTF is up with Romanian Jeff Tweedy?
01.26.09 at 4:06 pm
lil nigga mad cute
01.26.09 at 4:23 pm
I could drive at 2 months. That kid’s got nuthin on me
01.26.09 at 5:05 pm
How did the first kid do the fall? Stunt baby? CG? How about a director’s cut edit?
01.26.09 at 11:09 pm
oh, so that’s where you live. m.
01.27.09 at 6:11 am
Nice work Gavin, that was hilarious.
01.27.09 at 10:44 am
I’m pretty sure that I’ll never get sick of these.
01.27.09 at 4:40 pm
[...] STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » BABY DISCIPLINE [...]
01.27.09 at 8:56 pm
Thank god i finally got some Useful parenting advice from an expert.
Im also having problems with my Bitch. Do you have plans to release a pet parenting doggy-discipline video?…im really at my wits end here and could use the help of a pro.
06.02.09 at 6:58 pm