STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE

These aren’t new, but have you guys seen these jams from Durex? Pillows with barely passable women in their mid-forties who resemble meth-faced trannies provide longer lasting sex. They come in three tantalizing varieties.

The smoky-eyed gaze coupled with a phallic finger to the lips has been a killer classic in the annals of female seduction since Nefertiti. This ginger peach has a touch of Buddy Hackett in her. So delicate.

The pearl necklace on this WASPy lass is a nice touch. Looks like she is ready to take anything you give her.

Jesus, that was rough. Other classic boner killing forest trolls:

Your Mom

Vagina McPantsuit

These guys

And with those tidbits, have a nice day! And remember, no touching it while you’re at work. Toodles!

-Aviva Yael
www.everythingisannoying.com

This entry was posted on 01.29.09 at 8:24 pm by Aviva Yael. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.

27 Comments

Books & Backpacks Says:

Made for making nightmares.

01.29.09 at 8:26 pm
Kennedy Says:

Nothing smashes a boner like the thought of a Kimmy Gibler / D.J. Tanner threeway.

01.29.09 at 8:36 pm
pugnax Says:

those are some skitchin’ jams broheem. ah, sunny d alright!

01.29.09 at 9:32 pm
handsome henrietta Says:

fucking awesome

01.29.09 at 9:54 pm
drippy dog dix and cum or something Says:

I find that doing my multiplication timetables is rather effective. The ability to start and stop them at anytime adds an extra element of control.

01.29.09 at 11:09 pm
drippy dog dix and cum or something Says:

this is total fuxxing shit

01.29.09 at 11:20 pm
ZB Says:

this is like a year old..

01.30.09 at 12:16 am
buck Says:

when I’m gonna cum too soon, I imagine I’m fucking my dead grand father in his dick hole, leading to his cancer. It works, but…

01.30.09 at 3:13 am
Sketch McMuffin Says:

Boner killer ? Fuck that, I can get into this.

01.30.09 at 5:35 am
Sketch Says:

Hey some of those meth faces actually look a bit better after a few months smokin crystal. See 2nd from top on far left.

01.30.09 at 5:38 am
Chachi and the MS-13s Says:

Was this T. Richardson’s?

01.30.09 at 7:52 am
vegan jules Says:

the secret is to be focused on giving your girl an orgasm.

01.30.09 at 8:44 am
rashburn Says:

WHOA Hahahahaha! please- i can’t take anymore

01.30.09 at 10:53 am
SPECIAL Says:

yes, well, any sex advice coming from a vegan I do not take.

01.30.09 at 11:31 am
1X4 YOLANDA Says:

UHHH THOSE ARE COUNTER-PRODUCTIVE.
One might want to delay premature ejaculation but might end up losing their erection with those.

01.30.09 at 11:33 am
butter team Says:

wow, didn’t think I was just going to roll up on the innovation of the century today. OK.

01.30.09 at 12:30 pm
chairman mao Says:

thanks for showing me an advertisement.

01.30.09 at 1:19 pm
Necro Butcher Says:

late slip.

01.30.09 at 2:16 pm
Michael Says:

Prolonging a boner by imagining repellent acts on grannys with yuckmouth is sexual Russian roulette. It’s only a matter of time before you bust a nut just when you think you’ve got it under control and – bzzzt! – permanently crossed wires.

01.30.09 at 3:17 pm
1X4 YOLANDA Says:

Yep, then you can only cum while thinking aboht Gary Coleman…

01.30.09 at 4:21 pm
ur doing it rong Says:

I actually use the baseball method. What movie is that from, Porky’s?

But gotta be careful, I have a man crush on David Wright. 124 RBIs and and 2 Golden Gloves, he’s totes dreamy. No Homo.

01.30.09 at 5:02 pm
soul sonic force Says:

Ha ha “women in their mid-forties.” I guess “mid-fifties” would be sexier. And in the first one, who wants to last longer getting a blow job? Gentlemen, you’re just gonna get teeth, cuz our mouth muscles get tired after a while!

01.31.09 at 11:07 am
man Says:

when did you start wearing a condom to get head?

01.31.09 at 10:48 pm
bilbo Says:

faces of meth link: top middle picture is totally sarah silverman’s sister

02.01.09 at 3:08 am
chacun son goot Says:

gibbler DJ three way makes me bust if I’m bored. to each his own

Namasty

02.01.09 at 7:55 am
Emily H. Says:

– Soul Sonic Force, maybe the d00d in picture 1 is trying to delay orgasm so that he can fuck her after she’s been giving him head for a while? In general though, of course you’re right. Everyone loves to give blowjobs, but try to keep ‘em relatively brief.
– Jesus, those “faces of meth” people were not exactly lookers to begin with. Ouch.

02.01.09 at 4:07 pm
STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » 5 TOTAL DOYE BONER KILLERS THAT NEED TO BE DOCUMENTED EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE DOYE Says:

[...] you guys catch the last round of Boner Killers? I recently had to write an article about my least favorite topic in the world to talk about: sex. [...]

03.17.09 at 8:32 am

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ENLARGE

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STREET CARNAGE is mostly a website that features street fashion critiques called STREET BONERS and compilations of bad television called TV CARNAGE. The site also has a blog, a radio show, and regularly features video shorts made by Gavin and Derrick.

STREET CARNAGE is also a live presentation you can have in your town where Gavin shows a Street Boners "Best Of" and Derrick shows his latest TV Carnage endeavors.

STREET BONERS will eventually be compiled into a huge book which will feature hundreds of pages of Boners as well as contributions from Chloe Sevigny, Debbie Harry, Fred Armisen, Tim & Eric and many more.

Derrick makes videos for various bands as well as his own movies. His most recent project is called "Cop Movie" and is comprised of about three dozen different cop movies and he also has a workout video coming out that is made up of a million disgusting workout tapes. Gavin does freelance writing for TV, film and magazines and they both do funny acting stuff as well as other hilarious video shit we'll tell you about later. They are both dicks.

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