I have a story which perhaps you can help me put into perspective. A few years ago I met this girl at a bar and we hit it off quite well. We went home together that night and within in a week were living at each other’s apartments, fucking three or four times daily. I think she might have been on medication at the time, or getting off it. Anyway, at one point she got totally possessive and crazy and I had to get away from it, even though the sex was some of the best I’ve had and we were good together. After some months we tried to reconstruct a rocky friendship and we’d both be seeing other people and talk about it, etc. Then out of nowhere she got really hot and normal again (back on the medicine?), and we wound up in bed for what was supposed to be our awesome reunion. At the time however, I hadn’t gotten laid for several months, and our chemistry was off a little bit, so the sex kind of sucked, and it was my fault. Now she doesn’t respond to my phone calls or seem to have any interest in hanging out platonically or otherwise. Doesn’t she remember those nights of unbridled passion and two clenching good times? She writes for this online blog answering people’s questions about sex, and perhaps some young stud has stepped in to satisfy her, but I’m pretty sure she’s still single. I myself have found an awesome fuck buddy, and at least wanted to let her know I got my skills back to see if she was interested, or at least maybe just for a cup of coffee. Should I just let the whole thing go? What do you think Drew?
-This Guy You Used to Bone
Dude, I totally feel your pain here. When I first moved to New York I was totally obsessed with this hot guy I met at a bar (word to the wise: Never get involved with someone you meet at Cheap Shots) and after we “broke up” or whatever, I called a lot and he never responded. He was really mean, but I was into House M.D. at the time so I always pretended it was HIM who had the Vicodin addiction. We lived sort of close by, so I guess I thought it was sort of normal to stop by his house and ring his buzzer a lot when I was wasted, even though it was obvious he had gotten back with his ex.
So yeah, people who incessantly call you even though you are obviously pressing the IGNORE button on your cell phone after the eighth try kind of come off as psycho. My bad, but we live and learn, right?
That being said, why do you keep calling this chick? You had great sex FIVE YEARS AGO, and even then it wasn’t like earth-shattering, but pretty good. Still, I think you’re putting too much emphasis on your skills as a lover when in reality this girl doesn’t want to hang out with you because you are sort of humorless, dude, and have absolutely zero affect when you talk, which lends you a Patrick Bateman-esque quality that may have been appealing at one point but is way creepier when you call like five times in one hour.
If she ever wants to hang out again, she’ll let you know … although if you’re the type of guy that thinks telling a chick he’s got a fuck buddy so he’s “better at sex now” is a total turn-on to the ladies, I wouldn’t hold your breathe.
-Drew
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This was rad.
09.09.09 at 10:12 am
Oh damn. Public takedown. Awesome.
09.09.09 at 11:15 am
what a bitch
09.09.09 at 11:52 am
Girls going on and off their meds is so scary and fun! I didn’t know if I was going to get a hug or a vase thrown at me every time I would walk through the door. This one time I woke up to take a leak at night and she had the entire contents of the medicine cabinet out and was organizing all the bottles and floss and what not on the floor. It was fun until she went to the nutter for a very long weekend.
09.09.09 at 12:01 pm
drew, is it offensive that he attributed everything to you (oops, some chick) being “on medication…or getting off it”
09.09.09 at 12:22 pm
“Doesn’t she remember those nights of unbridled passion and two clenching good times?”
What the fuck is a “clenching good time”? I’m guessing this guy’s just a twat…
09.09.09 at 12:55 pm
nice burn.
09.09.09 at 1:01 pm
this is both confusing and awesome.
09.09.09 at 2:02 pm
I bet he thought he clever as fuck with this. LOLZ.
09.09.09 at 2:12 pm
Wait this guy reminds you of Patrick Bateman? You are an idiot to let that man go. You should call him up and ask him to get a hooker together. Oh and ask him what fold is best for a pocket square when wearing a tweed blazer. Thanks.
09.09.09 at 2:22 pm
best
09.09.09 at 3:29 pm
Bullet dodged!
09.09.09 at 3:53 pm
“breath”
09.09.09 at 4:29 pm
I call bullshit, but nice return to form. Fake articles are a hell of a lot more interesting than 90% of the shit that gets posted on SC.
09.09.09 at 4:33 pm
This is way better than watching naked interns.
09.09.09 at 5:15 pm
please fix the Leading on the text!
09.09.09 at 5:16 pm
oh and this was awesome! good burn Drew!
09.09.09 at 5:21 pm
Heyyyy WTF?
This was suppoed to be PRIVATE.
I’ll never confide in you again, I’m like totally hurt and everything?
09.09.09 at 6:12 pm
Nothing worse then lithium and a hot girl.
09.09.09 at 6:23 pm
ooooooh snap! yeah, but thinking that a good relationship is just based on good sex is dumb. has nothing to do with it. the type of dude who think like that are probably the same type of dudes who send pictures of their penis in response to personals ads.
09.09.09 at 7:11 pm
Damnnnn! Face!!
09.09.09 at 11:10 pm
I disagree. This site needs 39% more naked interns.
09.09.09 at 11:19 pm
last word should be breath not breathe
09.10.09 at 9:09 am
rad post. well done.
@Garbage Train Nice eye, asshole, you won yourself a peanut.
09.10.09 at 7:08 pm
That guy was such a homo.
09.11.09 at 2:33 am
i meant “toe clenching good times”
10.08.09 at 6:57 pm
BREATHE
01.12.10 at 7:50 pm