Dear Street Carnage,
Here’s some footage I got from a buddy that got back from a tour in Afghanistan. It’s a squad in the middle of a firefight in the Helmand Province otherwise known as the “Green Zone.”
You know, there’s always that cliché about war being this horrible, horrible thing where young men die or become mentally/emotionally scarred for life because of what they saw. Of course, some aspects of that ring true being deployed in the Middle East, but no one talks about the gleeful rush of seeing the enemy die.
Case in point, these guys look like their having THE GREATEST TIME of their fucking lives. As you see with the first Marine, he’s launching off mortars at Ali Baba BY HAND with a grin on his face the entire time while someone shouts a resounding, “Fuck yeah!” when the first mortar lands.
At about 8:15, a Marine runs up and blasts a M72 LAW. You see the young war machine up front shooting away his M16 for cover fire, and as that fucking bazooka shakes the rock they’re on; the guy is completely unfazed and pops back up to fire more rounds again. The video cuts off right before the air-strike hits being called in. This is a shining example of what the Marine Corps has to offer. Ladies, how can you not resist getting on your knees and blowing this guy to get all that motivation in your mouth? OORAH. Semper Fi, do or die, gung-ho, gung-ho, blood makes the grass grow.
Semper Fidelis,
Me
P.S. Our President “HOPE and CHANGE” Obama has sent 20,000 more Americans on the ground out to Afghanistan (as if anyone else coming in the White House would be doing anything different). Guess I’ll be going on a paid vacation to travel real soon…
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How come they’re not yelling “get some faggot motherfucker yeah son haha fuck!” my neighbors gotta that shit everytime I turn on the playstation.
Killzone 2 FTW
04.06.09 at 11:20 am
BADASS.
04.06.09 at 11:23 am
WELL SOME ONE SHOULD RUN DOWN TO BEEKMAN STREET BECASUE I AM BETTING THAT THE LINE IS OUT THE DOOR AFTER PEOPLE HAVE SEEN THIS VIDEO.
BUT OH COARSE HERE COME THE NYC LIBS, AS YOU CAN ALL READY SEE ABOVE THEY’RE ENRAGED RESPONCE’S SAYING “OH HOW CAN YOU KILL THE POOR ARABS THEIR JUST TRYING TO LIVE THEY’RE LIVES”
WELL THE FACT OF THE MATTER IS THAT FOR THEM TO LIVE THEY’RE LIVES MEAN FOR THEM TO TAKE YOU’RE LIVES SO IF YOU DO’NT WANT YOU’RE HEAD TO BE CUT OF BY A SIMITAR, LET’S KEEP EM FLYING BOYS!!
04.06.09 at 11:32 am
^ you jumped the shark last week, start a new alter ego and keep it a secret so I can like you again.
04.06.09 at 11:36 am
WELL “YOUR DOING IT WRONG” I DO’NT KNOW WHY YOU WOULD SAY THAT, WE YOU AND ME HAVE ALL WAYS HAD A GOOD RELATIONSHIP AND I HAVE ALL WAYS REALLY ENJOYED YOU’RE CONTRIBUTIONS TO THIS SIGHT. YOU ALL WAYS POST YOU’RE SINCERE VIEW-POINT’S AND REALLY HELP TO CONTRIBUTE AND KEEP BRINGING PEOPLE BACK, YOU ARE BASICLY SECOND ONLY TO EM!LY OR M@R¥. IN THAT REGARD. SO AS TO RESPECTIBLE MEMBER’S OF THE COMMUNITY WE SHOULD BE IN AGREEANCE. I REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID “WELL KRISTEE BRADKNOX HAS ‘JUMPED THE SHARK’ ” AND I SAID, WELL I GOTTA AGREE WITH YOU THEIR BUDDY!!!
04.06.09 at 11:55 am
“Ladies, how can you not resist getting on your knees and blowing this guy to get all that motivation in your mouth?”
Ladies? What about me?
04.06.09 at 12:03 pm
^^ oui have an relatoinship? Id’ shove u onto da trax jist fer teh lulz
04.06.09 at 12:15 pm
WELL “YOUR DOING IT WRONG” I ALL WAYS LEARN A SOME THING NEW WHEN EVER I TALK TO YOU, LIKE FOR EXAPMLE TODAY I AM LEARNING THAT “SHOVE U ONTO DA TRAX” IS A NEW STREET-SLANG FOR “HAVE A SEXUAL ACTIVITY’S WITH YOU”. YOU ARE A PLUGGED-IN CONNECTION!!
04.06.09 at 12:41 pm
I was just thinking about how I miss the Iraq Report, but this is will do. It’s nice to see that things are still happenin’ over there. FUCK YEAH
04.06.09 at 12:46 pm
Well at least these wars are killing off all of the Marines. fuck, they are annoying. Maybe it was just that jarhead movie and my hatred of jamie fox.God , I’d blow the terrorist that would scimitar jamie fox. He fucking squinted for whole movie and they gave him like ten oscars!!! WTF!!!!!
04.06.09 at 2:06 pm
can we just haev a column for JANG and ur doing it rong fighting each other?
04.06.09 at 2:44 pm
That movie Jarhead was awful, I remember getting annoyed every time Jamie Fox said “Ricky Tick!”. Apparently he is in a new movie where he plays a blind, homeless violinist.
That sinking ship Sirius/XM radio gave him over ten million dollars for his own radio channel. It’s called the Foxxhole and it is a bunch of hacky comedians playing snaps and making observations about weaves.
04.06.09 at 3:05 pm
^^ no
04.06.09 at 3:34 pm
no pun intended
04.06.09 at 3:39 pm
You people are totally insane.
04.06.09 at 5:40 pm
JANG didn’t jump the shark, but I’m pretty sure the cliched ass phrase “jumped the shark” did.
04.06.09 at 5:58 pm
urrahh motivators
04.06.09 at 6:10 pm
WELL “FUCK A WAR” I SEE YOUR TRYING TO TAKE A NIALISTIC “PUNK” POINT-OF-VIEW, BUT AS WE ALL WAYS SAY IT TAKES TWO TO ARGUE BUT “YOUR DOING IT WRONG” AND I ARE JUST HAVING A FRIENDLY REPOIRE LIKE ANY BROTHER AND SISTER (PS I AM A WOMAN)
(SIKE!!!!)
04.06.09 at 6:34 pm
more videos, please.
04.06.09 at 11:18 pm
I work with this guy who was in the army but didn’t go to Iraq because he’s even to much of a fuck up for that and got kicked out when he gets drunk after work on fridays before we all go home he acts like he was there and did some kind of undercover stuff that was really horrifying and brutal and starts crying and pretending to have flash backs and being an all around pussy I fucking hate that guy
04.06.09 at 11:54 pm
I’m sorry JANG, you ruined it. Your a clever fellow, and I’m sure you can move forward with a new angle. JST MY 2 SENSE LOL.
04.07.09 at 12:38 pm