STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » DEAR STREET CARNAGE: I GOT HECKLED

The other night while I was walking home (minding my own business!), I hot heckled by a dude on his porch. I thought it was funny so I wrote it down. His words are in quotes.

“Hey you, wanna box? You wanna box?”

No.

“What if you didn’t have a choice? What if we boxed you?”

Ehhgg! (Note: I don’t know how to type this. It was a high pitched squeal of indifference.)

“I like your wing tip shoes.”

Thanks boo.

“I was kidding.”

Thanks boo.

-COLE MILLER

This entry was posted on 11.16.09 at 9:01 am by SBTVC . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.

11 Comments

Atheist Says:

Fuck’s sake.

11.16.09 at 9:05 am
Zippy Says:

From the look of that picture, are you sure he didn’t want to pee on you?

11.16.09 at 10:30 am
wahoo Says:

best overheard fight instigation Ive seen was between two brown guys walking down granville street in vancouver on a saturday night..

first guy (eyeing up the other guy): Doz shoes, is faggot shoes!

second guy: D and G babeeee!

(they both throw 2 punches, fall over a bit, then keep walking because a cops a block away..)

11.16.09 at 10:32 am
drippy dog dix and cum bubbles or something Says:

Calling him boo made me laugh.

11.16.09 at 10:36 am
wtf? Says:

That wasn’t actually very funny.

Sorry boo

11.16.09 at 12:47 pm
Blogwigger Says:

That was actually very funny.

Sorry boo.

11.16.09 at 1:36 pm
bolo Says:

I don’t get it

11.16.09 at 1:52 pm
skull front Says:

in your… what am i doing

11.16.09 at 8:38 pm
micwreckah Says:

Good thing the dude keeps his wipe-off rag handy.

11.17.09 at 3:31 am
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Says:

really? you think thats funny?

11.18.09 at 12:47 pm
micwreckah Says:

a little too close to the bone, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?

11.18.09 at 1:23 pm

STREET BONER 1125

Pulling back your sleeve to show your tattoos seems queer but that’s what tattoos are: accessories.

E-mail it! | 14 Comments

STREET BONER 1124

You may have noticed there’s a lot of music industry chicks at SXSW all dressed up with no interest in you whatsoever. You may have also noticed you’re not in a band.

E-mail it! | 12 Comments

STREET BONER 1123

I love music nerds because they’re experts in other people saying, “Kick out the jams motherfuckers!”

E-mail it! | 16 Comments

The only way you’re going to get laid at SXSW is to find a girl who doesn’t mind having sex in a closet or on the floor of a shitty hotel room at six in the morning. In other words, you’re not going to get laid at SXSW.

E-mail it! | 23 Comments

STREET CARNAGE is mostly a website that features street fashion critiques called STREET BONERS and compilations of bad television called TV CARNAGE. The site also has a blog, a radio show, and regularly features video shorts made by Gavin and Derrick.

STREET CARNAGE is also a live presentation you can have in your town where Gavin shows a Street Boners "Best Of" and Derrick shows his latest TV Carnage endeavors.

STREET BONERS will eventually be compiled into a huge book which will feature hundreds of pages of Boners as well as contributions from Chloe Sevigny, Debbie Harry, Fred Armisen, Tim & Eric and many more.

Derrick makes videos for various bands as well as his own movies. His most recent project is called "Cop Movie" and is comprised of about three dozen different cop movies and he also has a workout video coming out that is made up of a million disgusting workout tapes. Gavin does freelance writing for TV, film and magazines and they both do funny acting stuff as well as other hilarious video shit we'll tell you about later. They are both dicks.

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