STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » FINALLY, KIDS CAN ENJOY COCAINE

Kids can do coke

Children are adorable but they get tired at like, 9 o’clock which means they can’t talk about how cool owls are or how we’re part of the top 1% etc., until the sun comes up. They also never grind their jaws or get bug-eyed and pronounce “Je-sus Li-z-ard” like they’re chewing on a gobstopper. Until now! Finally, the folks at KingPin Concepts have turned being wired into an all ages event and created Blow: Energy Drink Mix. Click here to buy some while listening to the Cult and looking at dumb girls from LA.

This entry was posted on 08.08.08 at 1:20 pm by SBTVC . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.

6 Comments

Fat People are Hard to Kidnap Says:

A HAPPY 8 O 8 0 8 goes out to the choad factor.
Take note, I’m serioulsy thinking of stealing this thread cause all you chicken shits have got nothing on kids and cocaine.

08.08.08 at 8:08 pm
sally Says:

lol Warning: do not snort

08.09.08 at 2:41 pm
nasa Says:

this is so old.

08.09.08 at 4:38 pm
shadowy figure Says:

The children next door don’t get tired at 9. These 5 year-olds are out riding their scooters at midnight, while their parents and/or legal guardians drink malt liquor in the front yard.

08.09.08 at 9:14 pm
Isabel from Ecuador Says:

Nobody rides scooters.

08.10.08 at 3:34 am
F4EVER Says:

I used to work for a certian Alt. Weekly in LA (switcheroo!) that advertized these Fucks. They’re a company of boomers selling ironic nichy garbage to kids. They’re also big pussies that won’t acually do real coke. Trust me, one of thier reps scowled and ran when F4EVER offered.

08.10.08 at 3:25 pm

STREET BONER 1125

Pulling back your sleeve to show your tattoos seems queer but that’s what tattoos are, accessories.

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STREET BONER 1124

You may have noticed there’s a lot of music industry chicks at SXSW all dressed up with no interest in you whatsoever. You may have also noticed you’re not in a band.

E-mail it! | 5 Comments

STREET BONER 1123

I love music nerds because they’re experts in other people saying, “Kick out the jams motherfuckers!”

E-mail it! | 15 Comments

STREET BONER 1122

The only way you’re going to get laid at SXSW is to find a girl who doesn’t mind having sex in a closet or on the floor of a shitty hotel room at six in the morning. In other words, you’re not going to get laid at SXSW.

E-mail it! | 22 Comments

STREET CARNAGE is mostly a website that features street fashion critiques called STREET BONERS and compilations of bad television called TV CARNAGE. The site also has a blog, a radio show, and regularly features video shorts made by Gavin and Derrick.

STREET CARNAGE is also a live presentation you can have in your town where Gavin shows a Street Boners "Best Of" and Derrick shows his latest TV Carnage endeavors.

STREET BONERS will eventually be compiled into a huge book which will feature hundreds of pages of Boners as well as contributions from Chloe Sevigny, Debbie Harry, Fred Armisen, Tim & Eric and many more.

Derrick makes videos for various bands as well as his own movies. His most recent project is called "Cop Movie" and is comprised of about three dozen different cop movies and he also has a workout video coming out that is made up of a million disgusting workout tapes. Gavin does freelance writing for TV, film and magazines and they both do funny acting stuff as well as other hilarious video shit we'll tell you about later. They are both dicks.

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