STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » JOHN TURTURRO PITCHES FOR HEINEKEN

John Turturro is in a new commercial for Heineken. But his script and delivery sounds like he’s talking about a packed bowl than a beer bottle.

No related posts.

This entry was posted on 01.22.09 at 12:29 pm by Denise . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.

16 Comments

imyar Says:

Holy fruit loop dialogue, did tom cruise write it? That being said, LOVE the Turturro.

01.22.09 at 12:36 pm
1X4 YOLANDA Says:

Does he mean beer-goggles?

01.22.09 at 12:47 pm
Deadbeatmanchief Says:

It sounds like he’s talking about a compass. Next time I order a Heineken, I’m ordering a compass. I’ll try and spit out one of his nonsensical lines too. That way I won’t have to tip because I’ll be all euro-trashy.

01.22.09 at 1:43 pm
blogne$$a Says:

remember when he was in that movie? with john goodman? and that other movie with john goodman?

king ralph was awesome.

01.22.09 at 2:08 pm
mtq Says:

He’s so awesome

01.22.09 at 2:55 pm
lol@u Says:

YOU SAID IT MEIN! NOBODY FUCKS WITH THE JESUS!

01.22.09 at 2:59 pm
Chachi and the MS-13s Says:

It beats Cuba Gooding Jr. in those Pepsi One commercials from 2000 or whenever the hell it was.

01.22.09 at 4:05 pm
brianD Says:

What is he saying? Does anyone have the transcript or something of this. I can translate most of it, but there’s something he says about your ‘own uncharted potential’. Anyone?

01.22.09 at 4:20 pm
Fizzlebottom Says:

poop

01.22.09 at 5:26 pm
man Says:

what this means is

“this beer is okay if there isn’t anything else in your fridge, but, honestly, why’d you buy it to begin with? grow up”

i think.

01.22.09 at 6:38 pm
uhh.. Says:

@ brianD- he said ‘reconnoiter of your own uncharted potential”

01.22.09 at 7:38 pm
blognigger Says:

i can’t believe gavin had one sentence to write in this post, and he couldn’t make it grammatically correct

01.22.09 at 9:29 pm
YELLA Says:

Boring as fuck.

01.22.09 at 10:01 pm
Guy Says:

wopnigger

01.23.09 at 4:59 am
Greg Says:

This is phenomenal.

“No destination is the destination of the undestinated,
but he who wanders with purpose, has no purpose to wander”

01.28.09 at 7:21 pm
Chris Says:

Where can I found out what he says exactly. I think that whole quote is harlarious but I can’t remember all of what he says. Can anyone help?

01.29.09 at 1:20 am

STREET BONER 1682

There’s a certain look girls have where you can just tell her boyfriend sucks and you could probably sweep her off her feet.

E-mail it! | 2 Comments

STREET BONER 1681

Looks like Dora the Explorer is all growed up and ready to party!

E-mail it! | 7 Comments

STREET BONER 1680

This is just as ridiculous as Beyoncé doing shampoo ads for “blondes.”

E-mail it! | 7 Comments

STREET BONER 1679

Meet the exception to the “Women are attracted to confidence” rule.

E-mail it! | 16 Comments

STREET CARNAGE is mostly a website that features street fashion critiques called STREET BONERS and compilations of bad television called TV CARNAGE. The site also has a blog, a radio show, and regularly features video shorts made by Gavin and Derrick.

STREET CARNAGE is also a live presentation you can have in your town where Gavin shows a Street Boners "Best Of" and Derrick shows his latest TV Carnage endeavors.

STREET BONERS will eventually be compiled into a huge book which will feature hundreds of pages of Boners as well as contributions from Chloe Sevigny, Debbie Harry, Fred Armisen, Tim & Eric and many more.

Derrick makes videos for various bands as well as his own movies. His most recent project is called "Cop Movie" and is comprised of about three dozen different cop movies and he also has a workout video coming out that is made up of a million disgusting workout tapes. Gavin does freelance writing for TV, film and magazines and they both do funny acting stuff as well as other hilarious video shit we'll tell you about later. They are both dicks.