While everyone in America is busy bitching about the stimulus package or being enamored with Obama’s new dog, the Third World is literally burning down. I know, I know: the Third World blows. Still, this shit is getting out of hand. Besides your typical, constantly smoldering shit-holes, like Afghanistan and Zimbabwe, there were three new flaming wrecks within the last week.
Thailand
If you think that America’s government is painfully slow paced and inefficient, just stop to consider that the Thai are still trying to come to terms with their monarchy.
Late last year, pro-monarchy protesters invaded municipal buildings, shut down the international airport in Bangkok, and toppled the government. For the past week, the new prime minister they installed has been dealing with pro-democracy demonstrations, which culminated in street riots that pitted protesters against the military.
Moldova
Have you even fucking heard of this country? I hadn’t until I met a kid from there, and he assures me it’s a little hellhole.
Moldova is currently the poorest country in Europe. It also used to be part of the U.S.S.R., so when the Communists won a recent election, people flipped a shit. Kids stormed the parliament before being beaten back by some old school, Soviet-style police brutality.
Madagascar
The set of CGI children’s movies erupted into flames after the closure of two radio stations prompted anti-government street protests. I guess Madagascarites really enjoy their tunes.
The demonstrations turned deadly after soldiers fired on protesters who refused to disperse. It’s all very ironic considering the new prime minister, who took over in a coup in a few weeks ago, used to be a DJ.
P.S. The most popular article in Kenya’s leading newspaper, the Daily Nation, is “Who says I can’t marry many wives?”
Leave a Reply
Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.
Good.
04.20.09 at 11:31 pm
Use that fire to light my herb. HAPPY 420 Y’ALL!!!
04.20.09 at 11:40 pm
“well that sucks!” – stan marsh, the end of the most recent south park
04.20.09 at 11:51 pm
h8 westernized pakis
sellouts
04.21.09 at 12:15 am
whats up wit eastern europe? they’re super poor, but they’re white? CRAZINESS!!
04.21.09 at 12:43 am
i dont give a fuck about them. though I think the morons at my school should pay attention to their moldovian equivalents, mostly at their complete denunciation of communism in all its “glory”.
04.21.09 at 1:11 am
yup, it literally is.
04.21.09 at 4:22 am
Malagasy….. not Madagascarites. Just saying. And yes, they do enjoy their tunes.
04.21.09 at 4:39 am
I thought everyone in America was bitching about how scared they get when they go to Albany.
You’d last about five seconds in the Third World.
04.21.09 at 4:53 am
we’ll be there soon enough. go global bitches
04.21.09 at 7:09 am
Why does everyone hate the third world? Sometimes it can be fun.
I think alot of people forget that fact.
Meh.
04.21.09 at 7:42 am
Nothing like rehashing some old news and then going around calling yourself a “writer.” What’s the freshest angle here? The 2 week old Moldova bit? Thank you so much for lighting up my dull white redneck mind this morning. It would be a burnt fuse without you. Maybe you should do a piece called “Scary White People in Albany Part II.” You can focus on Phil Markoff (former SUNY Albany student) and write from the “I told you so” angle. You are my writing GOD.
04.21.09 at 10:47 am
You saing my shit ain’t scary? Tell your sister to meet me in a hotel room and we’ll see who’s scary.
04.21.09 at 11:33 am
Your summary of the Thai protests is retarded. Everyone loves the king in Thailand, you idiot, and he’s also more of a figurehead. They are fighting about the exiled former prime minister and whether he should be allowed to run in a new election. It has a little something to do with the pure rural northerners he repped for, contradicted with his rampant corruption.
04.21.09 at 12:07 pm
yo what about that guy who like stabbed the shit out of his phsychiatrist in NY and some other people and just walked away? it was all over the news and they still haven’t caught that guy, or did they?
04.21.09 at 4:28 pm