Here’s a deceptively simple question: Who’s more sensitive to the plight of Jerry’s kids – Barack Obama or Jerry Lewis himself?
Too easy, right? I mean, Jerry Lewis is the founder of his namesake organization, a multi-million dollar charity that has helped tens of thousands of children fight Muscular Dystrophy; Barack Obama goes on talk shows and makes retard jokes.
I guess we have our answer – or do we?
Let’s review some important background information:
Anyone who has spent hard time in corporate America knows that the word ‘retarded‘ is the one technically un-PC word whose usage is completely acceptable in most company meetings. (That and ‘nigger‘)
No, but seriously, you can get away with saying ‘retarded’ in almost any context- it’s become even less sketchy than using the word gypped, go figure. Of all endangered species, Retards are the group that it is most socially acceptable to poke lite fun at.
Now, being a comparatively normal guy who at least watches The Wire and listens to Jay Z, Obama is instinctively aware of this social pocket of acceptability, and thus felt comfortable making a SELF-DEPRECATING retard joke about his bowling game.
Not bad! Pretty charming, if you ask me.
Of course I’m disappointed that he later started apologizing like a jerkoff – but it’s predictable that in our PC society he’d have to suck some balls after such an impromptu moment of honesty. Too bad this includes having to sit and listen to Morality Expert and Mongoloid-Maker Sarah Palin explain why retards are god’s chosen geniuses.
[Aside: Shit, did he even have to apologize? What if he just Kept it Real™ and rode his everyman status to suicidal glory:
We're not going to apologize to the gimpy bastards because we think the shit is funny. We're betting retards do too - just look at their expressions - the special olympics are some funny shit. DAH! nigga DAH!
Would a throw-down like this hurt Obama's 2012 campaign? Forget your knee-jerk reaction, and instead visualize the actual effects: Are there really enough retards to make a dent, and are they even allowed to vote? No, right?
Clearly, it's the retard-LOVER vote you'd have to worry about. Still, I refuse to believe that there are THAT many people who would change their support if Obama came out strongly against Retards.]
Now conversely, let’s take a look at Jerry Lewis: the sun shines out of his ass. Jerry would NEVER dis a gimp or a retard – the goddamn Jerry’s Kids® brand is named after him for christsakes. He’s a cripple-loving class act.
Ohhhhhhhhhh but wait, so solly: Ya see, it turns out that Jerry Lewis has a disabled fucking DAUGHTER who he abandoned and shuns and makes live in a car. Even Sloth got treated better all chained up to the TV – at least Anne Ramsey gave that nigga a ROOF!
Fucking scumbag hypocrite!! Shocking – He treats his OWN kids, the REAL Jerry’s kids, like that? Even retard-basher Barack Obama would be more sensitive to the plight of Jerry’s kid; a-ha, we’ve got our answer.
But alas, Obama made the retard joke, so public perception is that Obama is an insensitive fuck, and Jerry Lewis is a lovable drunken kyke who wouldn’t hurt a crippled fly.
That’s the point here you fags: Nobody gives a shit about action; it doesn’t matter what you DO in this fucking society, it only matters what you SAY. At the end of the day, we only give a fuck about soundbites that can fit into “Streetboning’s” 16-year-old attention span.
Ah, fuck it; this shit is all fleeting anyway – even the fucking economy doesn’t affect public perception in a lasting way. Wanna see really high ratings? In 2 weeks the President is getting his family a dog; then you’ll see his approval rating really fly.
Leave a Reply
Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.
STREET BONER 1127
Being straight edge as a kid is a great way to rebel against: puking, getting pregnant, and wrapping your parent’s car around a tree.
Bad Behavior has blocked 4461 access attempts in the last 7 days.
Ha! Barry Smooth and that “Hey Laadieeeees” guy.
Jerry hates homos too. Maybe one of his bastard babies is gay. So, a cripple, a homo, and I’m sure he as several “oriental” and “teh blecks” babies too.
That’s what Barry Smooth was laughing about on 60 minutes. Maybe one of them little thumby Down’s mofo walked behind Steve Kroft or maybe he just imagined Kroft as the guy at the grocery store saying hi and putting the carts back.
“Heh, heh. Steve I’m laughing because I’m imagining your retarded ass trying to get your short-thumbs into a bowling ball.”
03.25.09 at 9:40 am
Good post you faggot
03.25.09 at 9:48 am
every time i make fun of retards i get a twinge of fear in my balls that tells me i just upped my chances of spawning a retard baby someday, thats a good enuff reason for me to stop. now i only make fun of gays, gay babies are awesome.
03.25.09 at 9:50 am
You know what the difference is between blacks and retards? Retards don’t blame society for their incredibly low scores on IQ tests.
03.25.09 at 9:51 am
You’re the best poster now that Gavin has aids
03.25.09 at 9:53 am
Not to mention the long line of ‘Jerry’s Kids’ who are promised but never receive any funds/help.
You know what the difference is between fats and retards? Retards don’t blame society for their drowning of sorrows in troughs of fried shit and Ho Ho’s.
03.25.09 at 10:23 am
first of all, however much this site reflects all that is repugnant about “youth” culture, i would go so far as to say that the mainstream public has less of an attention span than the average reader of this website. citing precedent: look at all the scandals that the bush administration survived that most people have comparatively forgotten about entirely. downing street memo, anyone? valerie plame? heck, he’s even manageed to get away with minimal accountability for the financial disgrace we’ve all found ourselves in.
second, the whole retard-gate – if it can even be called that – is kind of a non-issue. i think it faded away less than 48 hours after he let it slip. i don’t watch fox news, so maybe one of those windbags is still harping on about it, but so far as i know, i don’t think there was a whole lot of public outrage on this one.
03.25.09 at 11:02 am
@ fatass: that’s the ONLY time in the 15 months or so that streetbonersandtvcarnage.com has been up that I’ve laughed out loud. good joke!
03.25.09 at 11:19 am
This article is retarded.
03.25.09 at 11:53 am
Disregard that everyone – my real message is that you should give dick and HIV a chance
03.25.09 at 12:26 pm
Obama sneers in his heart. He’s not a good dude, and just because Bush sucked too, it doesn’t make it okay.
03.25.09 at 12:38 pm
Can someone please second that ^”obama sneers in his heart”^ might be the gayest thing ever said?
03.25.09 at 12:48 pm
Agreed, that comenter is a gay christian father
03.25.09 at 12:54 pm
I’ve volunteered as a “trainer” for the Special Olympics. My experience with the “disabled” community did not warm my heart or inspire any sort of compassion. Once you’ve witnessed them in their natural habitat – suburban parks – you quickly recognize the appropriate emotion of approach: fear. Much like bear, the healthy specimens are irritable and powerful creatures driven primarily by natural instinct and sprinkle of bewildering emotion. A single softball to the back will render you helpless as they flirt with your girlfriend and saturate your Quiznos in drool. It takes a tender touch, but how rewarding it truly is.
03.25.09 at 1:00 pm
I’m sorry, I meant to say that “Obama is sincere in his heart. He’s a good dude, and just because Bush sucked, doesn’t mean that Obama sucks too.” What was I thinking? Accept my apology?
P.S. This article sucks.
03.25.09 at 1:02 pm
some retards can vote I worked in group homes where a bunch of the people voted I even worked with retarded pedophiles that voted they pretty much vote for who ever is working at the home so always liberal pretty much unless they are very christian
03.25.09 at 1:27 pm
WELL IT JUST GOES TO SHOW THAT BECAUSE I DECIDED TO BREAK CHARACTER AND SHOW THE WORLD THAT BEHIND THE GREAT JANG LIES A BORING YOUNG REPUBLICAN DOUCHEBAG THAT THESE COMMINTS STINK NOW AND ALSO AREN’T GOOD INCLUDING THIS ONE LOL.
03.25.09 at 2:11 pm
WELL THE COMENT ABOVE IS’NT ME. EVER SENSE THE BEGINNING THEIR HAD BEEN COPYCATTERS WHICH IS OBVIOSULY WHY I CALL MYSELF THE “ORIGINAL” SO YOU KNOW HOW IS WRITING. SO MANY HACKERS AND COPYCATTERS.
WELL BECASUE THIS WEB SIGHT IS CATERING PRIMARIALY TO THE INDY-ROCK CROWD I HAVE A QUESTION FOR HIM. WHAT WOUDL YOU DO IF I DID TELL YOU THAT YOU’RE INDY-ROCK IDLE “NICK CAVE” WAS’NT ACTUALLY BORN IN A “CAVE”. NO HE IS’NT A CAVE MAN. HE WAS BORN IN AUSTRIA JUST LIKE YOU OR ME.
WELL WHAT NOW WOULD YOU DO, MR. INDY ROCK? WILL YOU ATTEND A NICK CAVE CONSERT AND THROW “FLINT-STONE” VITAMINS IN THE FACE OF YOU’RE HERO’S AS IF YOU ARE SAY TO HIM, “THIS IS FROM A CAVE, BUT YOU ARE’NT?” WELL I DO’NT THINK YOU WOULD.
IN, FACT I THINK YOU WOULD SAY “OH NO HE IS THE VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANSE, HE WAS JUST BRAUGHT UP THAT WAY TO BELEIVE IN THE CAVE SUCH AS FROM THE NOVEL FROM YE OLDEN TIMES, “THE CAVE,” WHICH IS BY PLAYTO. AND HE IS LOOKING AT THE SHADOW’S ON THE WALL, BUT ALL SO A VERY GOOD SHADOW PREFORMEDR HIM-SELF. ROCK ON!!!”
WELL THIS MY FREIND’S, YOU’RE RESPONCE JUST GOES TO SHOW HOW THE “SOFT BIGGOTRY OF EXCEPTIONS” IS EXTENDS EVEN TO THE INDY-ROCK COMMUNITY.
WELL ANY WAYS MANY POEPLE SAYING JUST A NORMAL GUY (THAT IS ME) IS A SUCK’S. AND I WO’NT TO TELL THE TRUTH (DEREK BICKELS) YES I HAD A “BLOW UP” BUT IT WAS BECASUE B.N. WAS INSLUTING STUDNETS AND TRUTH-BE-TOLD I HAVE A MASTER DEGREE M.B.A. AND IT MAKE’S ME MAD. IT WAS’NT LIKE I WAS RIDING A DISERTASION ON “JOHN LUKE GODDARD INFLUENCES IN SACHA GRAY’S LATER WORK” WHICH WOULD PROBABLY MAKE ALOT OF MONEY IF A “WOMON” WRITES IT AFTER SHE GAVE A PLANT PARENT-HOOD SPEACH. (DEAR FEMINAZI’S, DO’NT STEEL MY IDEA OR I WILL STEAL YOU’RE I.U.D.)
WELL ANY WAYS I DO’NT KNOW IF YOU YOUNG-IN’S REMEBMER A LADY CALLED “JOAN JET” BUT WHEN SHE FIRST CAME OUT “IN THIS RAP GAME” IT WAS THE 1960’S AND SHE WAS A PUNK-ROCKER WITH KIM FOLEY (ANY RELATE TO AXL FOLEY LOL??) BUT THEN SHE WENT TO LITE SOUNDS AND HAD A HIT CALLED “BACK ON THE CHAIN GANG” WELL I AM “BACK ON THE CHAIN JANG” AND IT JUST GOES TO SHOW BY THIS.
OH P.S. TO THE POEPLE WHO CALLED ME “FAGGOT” “FAG” AND A “COCK FAGGOT” AND ALSO “A FAGGOT”, WELL I HAVE ALL WAYS SAID “EVEN IF YOU ARE A MAN OR A WOMAN I WO’NT FUCK YOU UNLESS HE HAS A DICK OR A PUSSY” SO BASICLY PUT THAT IN YOU’RE PIPE AND SMOEK IT. BUT I’M NOT GAY
03.25.09 at 2:17 pm
lol at these comments.
I was wrong. Attributing an emotion or action to someone’s “heart” in general is cheesy, so “obama sneers in his heart” is no longer the gayest thing ever said…it is now tied with “obama is sincere in his heart”. I mean I have a vagina and am inherently a sap, but c’mon, I’ll take your opinion that you don’t like Obama, or that you do?, but hold the cheese please.
Did anyone see him last night when the reporter asked if it was a tough moral decision to allow embrionic stem cell research? I just wish he would say “Uh, NO, actually I could give a shit, it is a blob of fucking cells people, what is there to feel bad about?” But instead, just like with his apology for the retard quip he has to be the definition of a polition and pussyfoot. Just be yourself man.
03.25.09 at 2:18 pm
“WELL I AM “BACK ON THE CHAIN JANG” For the epic epic win. jesus, whoever you really are, please, please don’t ever break character again. JANG is the most triumphantly realized character since Rodion Romanovich Raskolnikov.
03.25.09 at 2:39 pm
That’s fine, point taken, but if I say what I want to say, someone will delete it. This site can fuck off. Nothing whiskey dicks me more than a classic case of random censorship. Besides, it smells like someone’s flogging a ten year old horse corpse in this room. BORING.
03.25.09 at 2:44 pm
oops I said polition instead of politiciancianciancianciannnnnn
woop woop for jang “DEAR FEMINAZI’S, DO’NT STEEL MY IDEA OR I WILL STEAL YOU’RE I.U.D.” lol ur deeee best
03.25.09 at 2:50 pm
Holy shit, great point about the 1st dog, the OBama dog, the presidential dog.
You’re right that that will send approval rating through the roof. Sometimes this country makes me want to put my head in an oven. But then I remember that there’s a new episode of Sober House on and I decide to live another day.
I’m probably going to go masturbate to a porn now – something with teens 18+ etc
she wants it and so i double click, HATE the fuckin rebuffering.
also agree that StreetBoning is officially the worst commenter worse than the fake new JUST A NORMAL GUY darkening our eSponses.
03.25.09 at 3:02 pm
why are you lock me out of comments, huh?
you suffer like dog for dinner, america. suffer with so call “king of comedy” and “king of blacks” people.
china will rule the universe!!
from Preck!
03.25.09 at 3:20 pm
article was great but that has to be the worst photoshop i have seen all day. please fix.
03.25.09 at 4:22 pm
fake jang comment was horrible.
03.25.09 at 5:15 pm
BN: You missed Jerry Lewis’ ‘tard gaffe from 2001
“Pity? You don’t want to be pitied because you’re a cripple in a wheelchair? Stay in your house!”
–Jerry Lewis, CBS Sunday Morning, May 20, 2001
from: http://www.cripcommentary.com/LewisVsDisabilityRights.html
Lewis got away with that one, and even got CBS to edit the comment out of the broadcast.
Lewis wins. Finish him! Fatality!
03.25.09 at 6:12 pm
JUST a normal guy imitation is lame, not even close dirtbag.
Ps BN fuck you you wannabe poser
03.26.09 at 8:58 am
post and comments. this is the internet, shorten it up.
03.26.09 at 11:20 am
WELL OBVIOSULY THEIR SOME POEPLE OUT THEY’RE STILL DO’NT BELEIVE THIS IS ME JUST A NORMAL GUY, THE “ORIGINAL”. BUT THEY ARE JUST FALLING PRAY TO THE DIS-INFORMTION CAMPANE CONDUCTED BY NYC LIBS JUST DO’NT WANT TO SEE ME SPEAKING IN PLANE ENGLISH IN THEY’RE LITTLE “HIPSTER” CUBBY-HOLE. YES A GOOD, SRTONG, DOES OF NORMALSY IS JUST WHAT THE DOCTOR ORDERRED.
YES MANY NYC LIBS HAVE BEEN IMPERSENATING ME OVER THE PASSED FEW DAYS AND THE LONG-AND-SHORT OF IT IS THAT IT IS A SMEAR CAMPANE. I CAN JUST SEE THEM NOW ON “DEMOCRAT’S UNDER-GROUND” WRITING A BLOG POST “JANG INVENTED AIDS AND INGECTED IT INTO A CRACK-ROCK THEN HE GAVE IT TO A MONKEY IN AFRICA AND AN AMERIKKKKAN BUISNESS-MAN (LITTLE EICHMANNS LOL) HAD SEX WITH THE MONKEY SIMLUTANIOUSLY WHILE HE WAS EATING A MONKEY AT THE SAME TIME PATIENT ZERO!!!! JANG IS A NARK PIG”
WELL ANY WAYS I GUESS I WILL HAVE TO RE-0GAIN YOUR TRUST. PLEASE TRUST IN ME.
03.26.09 at 12:12 pm
nice try fakejang
03.26.09 at 4:38 pm
Anne ramsey is a psycho throwback
03.26.09 at 6:48 pm
Wake up White people!
The niggers and jews just teamed up in this phony baloney fight to distract White America!
Now you’re sitting in your living room wondering who’s right and the jews are sneaking up behind your lazyboy trying to pick your hard earned money out your pocket while the niggers are necking with your wife out the back door. Hell while your at it maybe you should get pakis to stink up your kitcken like curry shitfuck and get some cheap chinese crapsocks that fall apart after one week. After thats all done with you can get the camelfuckers over to BBQ the American Flag(made in mexico) in your backyard.
P.s. Burn in hell queers.
White power.
03.26.09 at 9:17 pm
I miss Mortal Kombat 3.
03.27.09 at 2:20 am