Photos by Keith Newell
Fat, ugly, old people have whole lives. I keep forgetting that. What I mean is: They’re alive every minute of the day; they go places; they have feelings. They have fashion!
This fashion and crusts-off mini sandwiches and tea party was made up of donated clothes to Ruth’s House in Haverhill, Massachusetts and MC’d by one of the four totally glamorous and bedazzled old ladies who run it. They used the profits to buy clean underwear and socks for poor families.
1. “Cindy’s clip earrings pick up the tones in her stunning Aztec design sequin top.”
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2. “In his chestnut stretch long-sleeve shirt paired with a Domani polyester print tie made in the USA, doesn’t he look handsome?”
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3. “A retired meat cutter from Shaw’s, Ben pairs an acrylic and poly blend easy care sweater with corduroys … goes just about anywhere.”
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4. “Wonderful holiday ensemble”
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5. “A wonderful swing three-quarter coat in leopard design, it is made of acrylic and lined in polyester. Susan has added a 100% felt wide-brimmed chapeau accented with wove flowers. Doesn’t she look great?”
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6. “In his brown leather vest tailored by skilled craftsmen, Jay’s ready for a night on the town.”
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i love them all!
11.24.09 at 11:19 am
Is it Church Couture or is it Charity Couture? Regardless, a great fashion article.
11.24.09 at 11:31 am
so kind of you to post that here. i just sent ruth’s house a quick note with a link; i’m sure they’ll appreciate the shout-out.
11.24.09 at 11:42 am
If Haverhill, MA is only 30 miles east of Grinnell, IA then yes- this doesn’t smell like complete bullshit.
11.24.09 at 11:50 am
^What does that mean? That the fashion show did NOT happen in Haverhill, MA, and it’s a conspiracy?
11.24.09 at 12:09 pm
See Jen? you pretentious TWAT!
THIS is a high-fashion post.
11.24.09 at 12:10 pm
you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
brilliant.
11.24.09 at 12:28 pm
I think Cindy’s stuff is great but the aztec thing ’s been done. I mean, lets face it aztec is az played out as you can get
11.24.09 at 12:31 pm
We’ll see what Lisa looks like in twenty years. I’m sure she will be the one to beat Father Time.
11.24.09 at 12:33 pm
I think Jay looks alright, his pants fit atleast. Mmmmm, I wouldn’t mind gettin all into that “Wonderful holiday ensemble.”
11.24.09 at 1:04 pm
Yeah. Fucking take note, Jen. These is the true definition of “gnarlitude.”
11.24.09 at 1:22 pm
This post is fucking amaaaaaazing. Susan looks like Iceberg Slim.
11.24.09 at 1:42 pm
Not enough turtlenecks.
11.24.09 at 2:12 pm
Aztec things kick azz
11.24.09 at 2:25 pm
Couldn’t at least one of them be sitting on an old motorcycle with a ridiculous expression and his or her nipples out?
Is Jen Hanley the one with the teapot?
11.24.09 at 3:44 pm
Someone should pay Lisa Carver large sums of money to attend events and simply report back her subjective experiences. JOYFUL!
11.24.09 at 5:22 pm
I need to get to church more often. Apparently, the God-fearing know how to turn a fashion gala out. Who’d have thought?
11.24.09 at 5:28 pm
A 40+ year old making fun of 60+ year olds on a site for 20+ year olds (maybe), time is folding in on itself
11.24.09 at 6:14 pm
adorable
11.24.09 at 6:22 pm
They all look RADD
11.24.09 at 6:34 pm
I want that sequins south west sweater
11.24.09 at 6:34 pm
A+++++++++++++++++++++
No holds barred.
Like Maddox(.xmission.com)’s mean-funny critiques of children’s artwork, but much more cruel, less tongue-in-cheek (and thus safe), and way funny.
Yes!
11.24.09 at 6:45 pm
mentally unstable, check.
old people, check.
hey, maybe you could make fun of how child sex slaves sit in old dudes’ laps calling them “daddy” because they’re so lacking boundaries and protection. like, roll the cameras while the old dudes react with bewildermen and, sometimes, an erection. waa,waa,waa…all in good fun, of course.
the weakest of the weak exploit put up the most vulnerable for fodder.
11.24.09 at 7:19 pm
I see the light. From now on, I’m only interested in talking to stable, young, invulnerable people.
11.24.09 at 7:26 pm
well here I am fire away
11.24.09 at 7:49 pm
how about you poke some fun at yourself, creepazoid?
11.24.09 at 9:27 pm
11.24.09 at 11:25 pm
i love them.
11.25.09 at 12:52 am
these guys look like my creative writing class.
11.25.09 at 7:10 am
god i hate this website
11.25.09 at 9:45 am
i’ve got a sense of humor but you (lc) pretty much just revealed yourself as a total horrible bitch. i would never hang out with you.
this website does suck. why do i waste my time here?
11.25.09 at 11:23 am
lisa is a goddess. the rest of you have sand in your vaginas and should probably go back to reading boing boing before something really upsetting happens.
11.26.09 at 9:22 am