Bud will not make you wiser. St. Ides will give you crooked eyes. That’s some fitness advice from a bunch of guys who have been to the cooler.
I always thought joining a gym was fucking lame because when I was just a little shitpants kid I saw this made-for-TV movie, The Jericho Mile, where this white dude serving 25 ta life trains himself to become a record-breaking distance runner. The moment I witnessed said white dude doing pull-ups from a broomstick hung across his cell, I knew I would never join a gym ever. In fact, I dug that movie so much that I bee-bopped around the family room and brazenly decreed to my father that I was gonna go to prison too, so I could be tough and cool-looking like all those black guys. He muttered something about a “cornhole” before taking another sip of his Genny Cream. Thankfully, I was born a few nut-job degrees short of sociopath and never ended up in prison. But, you know, there’s always next year. In the meantime, I will shakily squish out my pull-ups in the comfort and stark loneliness of my own room. I can do thirteen.
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Whaaaaa?
02.02.10 at 12:10 pm
I can’t do 1/8th of one pull up. I fear an impromptu contest the way ordinary people fear public speaking
02.02.10 at 12:23 pm
Wide or regular grip Schwarzenegger?
02.02.10 at 12:40 pm
i can do 36.
02.02.10 at 1:29 pm
/.
02.02.10 at 1:37 pm
I WORK OUT ONLY USING MY TEETH.
02.02.10 at 1:58 pm
working out is good if it’s not what your “all about”
02.02.10 at 2:10 pm
I pull myself up out a chair maybe once a day. I find the effort exhausting.
02.02.10 at 2:34 pm
Is it just me or do these dudes remind everyone of a bunch of monkeys in an urban jungle? …you know you thought it too, don’t like to yourself.
02.02.10 at 3:14 pm
@yeah, whatever;
but i always like to myself.
don’t hate on liking to yourself, man, you might find it pleasurable to yourself.
02.02.10 at 3:49 pm
^^^
Zing!
02.02.10 at 4:16 pm
zingers r gross
02.02.10 at 4:30 pm
I really like Mike’s posts.
02.02.10 at 5:15 pm
I recommend the Ab Ripper X routine as part of your overall workout. It feels good to be strong, and when the apocalypse comes you’re going to need those muscles to survive girly-man.
02.02.10 at 5:22 pm
you should check out crossfit don’t join a gym or anything just make all your own stuff maybe buy a kettle bell or a weight bar I can do 33 dead hang pull ups and 50-60 kipping pull ups and I never get bored of working out
02.02.10 at 7:06 pm
Their buttocks are sublime.
02.02.10 at 7:40 pm
These guys look like they are gymnasts (i.e. homosexuals) who are afraid to admit it (i.e. come out of the closet).
Not surprising this came off of worldstarhiphop.com, the only person I know that goes to that site also is a frequent visitor on youngblackandfabulous.com, which is basically Us Weekly for black people.
02.02.10 at 7:51 pm
BRONSON MUTHAFUCKASSSSSSSSS
02.03.10 at 1:39 am