Comments on: WAYS NOT TO FUCK UP A FUCK

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 07 Dec 2010 06:18:55 +0000

Oh man. Just to add the fifty-seventh bit of affirmation… if a girl says “we can sleep together but no funny business”, you have two choices. You can lie motionless in her bed for 9 hours like a mannequin with an erection and get no sleep as she releases clouds of sexfumes from her armpits and pussy into your face – and congratulations, you will now NEVER have sex with this particular bitch. Or you can say “goodnight” when she switches the light off, lean over her and kiss her cheek, then kiss her on the lips, then stuff your fingers in her pussy, then fuck her silly. Every time a girl I like has suggested sleeping in her bed and given me a “no funny business” ultimatum I’ve sworn on my mother’s life not to touch her twinkle. Then I’ve gleefully broken my promise and enjoyed some awesome pussy as soon as the lights go out. Secret hint: girls like cock – they just say that stuff to make themselves feel like they’re not being sluts. (As if I would give a fuck if they said “sleep over tonight and pound my pussy”. Actually, on second thoughts if they did say that I’d go off them a bit.)

By: Ah so

Ah so — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 10:13:44 +0000

Fuck tup.

By: Nightime is Never the Right Time (for Facebook Chat) « Urban Courting

Nightime is Never the Right Time (for Facebook Chat) « Urban Courting — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 12:18:26 +0000

[...] by wookin pa nub Soo, I was reading this fantastically awesome article on Street Boners all about Ways Not to Fuck up a Fuck . Amid all of the salient points presented, one stuck out in [...]

By: Uncle Joey

Uncle Joey — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 22:08:36 +0000

This article wasn’t about getting laid it was about getting laid for the first time. Didn’t you guys pick up on that right away? Not everyone loses their virginity before their mid twenties, you know.

By: Spandrell

Spandrell — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 14:18:22 +0000

Also @Anonymous
“except for once. i was on a fourth date with a very smart and funny but terribly nerdy guy blah blah…”

That was funnier than the article and it took a sixth of the time to read. That is economy. Give this bitch a column.

By: powersaucebars

powersaucebars — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:50:49 +0000

hahaha breeders and the things they do to get laid

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 07:02:41 +0000

I detest the position these Platform articles come from….
‘Oh, us art guys, oh oh oh’
‘She won’t go with THAT guy, he is a chump’
‘Oh, us ART GUYS, OH OH OH’
etc

Half the time your weirdly dressed, hot, ‘artchick’ friend just wants some guy who will man up and fuck her without flirting around the subject like some fucking Japanese minister talking about slaughtering wales.

Dressing weird is her only fucking outlet as her sexual energy, which naturally should be escaping from her vagina is being unaturally backed up as all the guys she is surrounded by are arguing about David Lynch and stuff so it goes back up and into her head and she goes down the thrift shop and flails around spasmodically like a sprayed fly until she is covered in clothes then walks out the door.

By: Super Broker

Super Broker — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 02:03:02 +0000

Enough of this Foster clown; I want to read more about sex from Gavin. I tried out his “I’m your property” line on my bf (I said, “I’m your property, Dick Johnson, and you can cum anywhere you want”)- it fucking ruled.

By: Professor Mudbutt

Professor Mudbutt — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 01:26:17 +0000

Cut the bitch.

By: Spandrell

Spandrell — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 22:29:47 +0000

“Man, this one is just sad. Who’s the audience here?”

In my one or two cursory visits to Platform after it was repped on SBTVC I got the distinct impression that their readership is slightly more, uh, pathetic I suppose is the only word that springs to mind, than the one here. Hard to quantify just a gut feeling really.