STREET BONER 91

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“Hi, I shoot exotic fish and sell them to Japanese tourists, then I get stoned and listen to music with my friends. What’s your job?”

★★★★★★★★★★

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32 Comments

  1. Loomis Says:

    I organize arrogant teenagers who go out and conduct a monthly census door to door so marketing companies can use the statistics to market their products. I make less than a babysitter because I pay taxes. The only good thing about this job is I can occasionally not do anything all day but surf the internet and nobody notices. Is this why God put me here?

  2. muthafutha Says:

    my job is to relax. and enjoy it. sometimes i might have a nice cold one whilst on the job. a reasonably stress free existence. oh yeah, and get stoned and listen to music with my friends. that guy in the pic, at least he gets to go spear fishing in the ocean. it’s still winter here in canada.

  3. mr.wilson Says:

    I shoot Japanese tourists and sell them to Rastafarians, then I listen to the stones with my fish.

  4. Randy Says:

    Older gentlemen pay to hang out with me and my friends so they can rape our culture and sell it back to us. The pay is sub-par but the drugs are great.

  5. Brandon Says:

    I sell cell phones at the mall.

  6. meat Says:

    i work at cheesecake factory.

  7. Trans Fat Says:

    I make Japanese tourists out of old cell phones and natto and sell them to the airlines. What they choose to do with them is their business.

  8. aesk47 Says:

    I eat Japanese tourists while using my old cell phone on a crashing airliner! I’m also college educated.

  9. terry hall Says:

    I work for my local municipality picking up garbage

  10. GRRRRRR! Says:

    I’ a low rate rentboy that lets Japenese tourists piss in my mouth for a crack hit

  11. atkins Says:

    “..i also content with crippling poverty and tetanus.”

  12. atkins Says:

    “..and my dreadbeard smells like krill.”

  13. KINE Says:

    feel good boners today

  14. Jon Mayer Says:

    I rock so hard it’s ludicrous.

  15. eatadick Says:

    I write social commentaries about people on the internet! Using my own inadequacies and limited life experiences to mock and humiliate people with disabilities, old folks, young children, gays and niggers.

  16. bolo Says:

    I sell weed to that guy…

  17. Eatadick's Life Coach Says:

    You’re in a crowded field, my friend. Take up angioplasty and/or move to Mongolia.

  18. k Says:

    i do poos

  19. 000 Says:

    Was this question Rhetorical?Finally!!Boners care!!!

  20. db Says:

    i take the music that he and his friends listen to, and play it to various people in dark rooms. it seems to work ok, even so far out of context that they have to go outside to light a cigarette.

  21. Scrotum McDee Says:

    That’s one of the best captions you’ve ever written.

  22. skutch mcchuch Says:

    i send out tons of paperwork to assholes so they can get rich putting out mind-numbingly shitty television shows. i would like to work for that gentleman. i have reasonably good aim and am familiar with puff puff pass s.o.p.

  23. Anonymous Says:

    I try to write witty shit on internet discussion boards but I suck at it

  24. KITTEH Says:

    HONESTLY!
    (To the caption.)

    Fuck, I’m soooo into/feelin/getting this guy.

  25. JOhannes Says:

    I’m writing my MA thesis on the Problem of Evil.

  26. the tourist Says:

    I dress up in my wife’s clothes while she’s at work and secretly like it. Though I don’t know how much longer that secret’s going to last considering my son saw me dancing to booty music. I am so alone.

  27. blake Says:

    I am that guy’s son. please kill me.

  28. Maarlen Bierhat Says:

    Holy shit, that IS My Job! exept that I enable comments for barely literate Finnish-borne Americans - on photography subjects my uni-lingual ass is unworthy to kiss. mhmm, tetanus.

  29. Replicant Says:

    Ahhhhh, the elusive ganja fish….

  30. billiam5billion Says:

    I’m a librarian, at least I get to come to work high.

  31. dh48 Says:

    Well fuck, I sit on my ass and read about you killing said exotic fish and smoking with your friends.

  32. fuck Says:

    i would blaze with this guy any day

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July 3, 2009 12:00 pm


This person is going to chew you up and puke you out but you’re not a man until you’ve: had your heart broken, broken a heart, had the shit beaten out of you, and beaten the shit out of someone, so you might as well get this first part over with.

★★★★★★★★☆☆

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July 3, 2009 4:31 am


Are the words “J.A.P.s in July” in any Broadway songs about how great New York is? They should be.

★★★★★★★½☆☆

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