STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » BLACK DURING FEBRUARY

Star Jones = Joan Crawford meets Coco Chanel with a little Josephine Baker thrown in for good measure. That’s why she’s so big. What can’t we say about Star Jones?
Lawyer, Head of “Girlfriend Enterprises” ,educated, Black and she’s self-obsessed. That is the best part because she does that with so much ease.
Maybe the hint is in her name “Star”. Nahhh that can’t be it. That’s a pretty humble name. Maybe a hint is that she married Al Reynolds; suspected of being part Gay, and never noticed this because she was looking in the mirror constantly talking about “Starrrrrrr”. OH SHIT! Wait AL publicly came out (not that way) and said he WAS NOT GAY! Shit. So much for that theory. So did she….
Wait, what about when she used The View as a proxy home shopping network for her own wedding. Fuck. No she said she didn’t do that either.
Oh well, I’m wrong. I lied. She is not self-obsessed.
She is a strong Black woman and I’m proud! So there!

CHECK OUT OUR RADIO INTERVIEW WITH SEAGAL HIMSELF! YES… WE DID!

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This entry was posted on 02.24.09 at 2:26 pm by D. Eric Beckles. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.

6 Comments

Richard Stabone Says:

Cotton balls are made for girls?!? What am I going to use now to fix…

02.24.09 at 2:32 pm
alex Says:

Not cool ironic carnage, just plain awfull. I believe the part about her marrying a gay man. Clearly he is not a macho men. He’s a cranky fat bitch gay guy. Former stylist at Supercuts? Also, its impossible to imagine any straight man without a masochistic streak this side of Cobain sticking. Just listen to what she says. Sounds like every annoying woman ever, multiplied by a milion.

02.24.09 at 11:57 pm
funnyfaces Says:

Dear Tv carnage. You make good shitty. love it

02.27.09 at 7:12 pm
Mr. De Quad Says:

the soundtrack is apropos of dropping bad acid with your mom

03.04.09 at 12:10 pm
Dane42o Says:

Isn’t this the same girl that said the earth was flat? Educated my ass.

03.08.09 at 10:15 am
omgkatiekatiekatie Says:

dane– no, that was sherri sheppard (shephard? shepherd?). the *other* fat black lady on “the view”

03.23.09 at 8:01 pm

STREET BONER 1681

Looks like Dora the Explorer is all growed up and ready to party!

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STREET BONER 1680

This is just as ridiculous as Beyoncé doing shampoo ads for “blondes.”

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STREET BONER 1679

Meet the exception to the “Women are attracted to confidence” rule.

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STREET BONER 1678

When I’m mayor, brass knuckles will no longer be illegal but short hair and flats will.

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STREET CARNAGE is mostly a website that features street fashion critiques called STREET BONERS and compilations of bad television called TV CARNAGE. The site also has a blog, a radio show, and regularly features video shorts made by Gavin and Derrick.

STREET CARNAGE is also a live presentation you can have in your town where Gavin shows a Street Boners "Best Of" and Derrick shows his latest TV Carnage endeavors.

STREET BONERS will eventually be compiled into a huge book which will feature hundreds of pages of Boners as well as contributions from Chloe Sevigny, Debbie Harry, Fred Armisen, Tim & Eric and many more.

Derrick makes videos for various bands as well as his own movies. His most recent project is called "Cop Movie" and is comprised of about three dozen different cop movies and he also has a workout video coming out that is made up of a million disgusting workout tapes. Gavin does freelance writing for TV, film and magazines and they both do funny acting stuff as well as other hilarious video shit we'll tell you about later. They are both dicks.