STREET BONERS and TV CARNAGE » DIE LIKE A MAN FOR GOD’S SAKE.

What ever happened to men dying like men? When a monster comes at you, smirk and and start singing the national anthem (the toughest song I can think of) and when your car starts to flip over, pull out a picture of a topless lady and say “Nice boobies”. Then when you catch on fire in your truck, don’t run around, screaming like a fairy or something! Sit in your truck, pull out a steak from the glove box over there and start cooking it on your flaming lap. You could even say something like: “I’ll flip you over when you’re done if you flip me when I’m done.” Then chuckle, and quietly admit to yourself ” ahhh shit… in over my head, in over my head”

This entry was posted on 04.28.08 at 7:10 pm by Derrick Beckles. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 2.0 feed. You can E-mail it to a friend.

3 Comments

Gayboners Says:

Isn’t that how every SciFi Channel Original Movie ends?

04.28.08 at 9:44 pm
telly Says:

oh maan that is good TV CARNAGE

04.29.08 at 4:15 am
Haze Says:

the guy in the car went out like a bitch. Blackbeard’s ghost must be a badass

04.29.08 at 5:01 pm

STREET BONER 1127

Being straight edge as a kid is a great way to rebel against: puking, getting pregnant, and wrapping your parent’s car around a tree.

ENLARGE

E-mail it! | 26 Comments

STREET BONER 1126

“Wiggers” is a mean word that stings like a motherfucker but, somehow, “Bonkies” doesn’t pack the same wallop.

E-mail it! | 19 Comments

STREET BONER 1125

Pulling back your sleeve to show your tattoos seems queer but that’s what tattoos are: accessories.

E-mail it! | 19 Comments

STREET BONER 1124

You may have noticed there’s a lot of music industry chicks at SXSW all dressed up with no interest in you whatsoever. You may have also noticed you’re not in a band.

E-mail it! | 15 Comments

STREET CARNAGE is mostly a website that features street fashion critiques called STREET BONERS and compilations of bad television called TV CARNAGE. The site also has a blog, a radio show, and regularly features video shorts made by Gavin and Derrick.

STREET CARNAGE is also a live presentation you can have in your town where Gavin shows a Street Boners "Best Of" and Derrick shows his latest TV Carnage endeavors.

STREET BONERS will eventually be compiled into a huge book which will feature hundreds of pages of Boners as well as contributions from Chloe Sevigny, Debbie Harry, Fred Armisen, Tim & Eric and many more.

Derrick makes videos for various bands as well as his own movies. His most recent project is called "Cop Movie" and is comprised of about three dozen different cop movies and he also has a workout video coming out that is made up of a million disgusting workout tapes. Gavin does freelance writing for TV, film and magazines and they both do funny acting stuff as well as other hilarious video shit we'll tell you about later. They are both dicks.

Bad Behavior has blocked 4411 access attempts in the last 7 days.