I’ll tell ya something for free.When I was a kid, a pack of gum was $1.00, rap music was big and we hunted for our pornography. Hours in front of the TV with a hard-on and half a glass of wine, waiting for a nipple or a flash of bush or whatever you were into. We waited for adults to carelessly throw away their pornography,disguised as a pile of Sports Illustrated, but sandwiched in between were your Swanks and your Hustlers and when you found them you would sneak into your house with a bulge in your pants and sport’s coat. Now it’ s all this interim-net shit, just sitting their waiting to be viewed. It’s like fucking fish in a barrel or I guess a NET. Anyway, to give you an idea of what it was really like, you would rub one out to old snaketits if you were lucky enough to find her… yep, those were the lean years.
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STREET BONER 1127
Being straight edge as a kid is a great way to rebel against: puking, getting pregnant, and wrapping your parent’s car around a tree.
Bad Behavior has blocked 4461 access attempts in the last 7 days.
True, true.
I used to sleep over at friends’ houses and insist on staying up to catch Showtime After Hours or whatever because I didn’t even have cable. How to: spank it quietly while your friend snores… Oh, Emmanuelle!
To be honest and sad, sometimes Benny Hill was enough for me.
Shit’s a series of tubes now, son. EZ.
07.16.08 at 1:44 pm
that was the most beautiful tv carnage clip ever!
07.16.08 at 2:40 pm
where can a guy get an isolation tank nowadays?
07.16.08 at 2:56 pm
I remember the days id have to toss the tadpoles to scrambled ppv porn.
We live in a golden age.
07.16.08 at 3:57 pm
We had a bucket hidden in the woods filled with little torn pages of playboys that we salvaged from neighborhood trashcans. Now I can go onto pornhub for free and simultaneously watch lesbos dildo each other and a latina cheerleader gangbang.
07.16.08 at 7:13 pm
We had a bucket hidden in the woods filled with little torn pages of playboys that we salvaged from neighborhood trashcans. Now I can go onto pornhub for free and simultaneously watch lesbos dildo each other and a latina cheerleader gangbang.
07.16.08 at 7:13 pm
Dude, you totally didn’t talk about Showcase or have you seen the Latin Channel (29) now a days. But yeah, I have some really meaningful memories from then. I saw two girls swap spit on an episode and had no clue as to the possibilities!
07.16.08 at 11:14 pm
this is from altered states. i know it is. i rented this fuckin movie because id watched everything else at family video twice over and it had neat cover art on the dvd. motherfucker turns into a monkey (the guy not snake tits). thats all you need to know. that and its a movie about sensory deprivation and psychoactive drugs, and it features the film debut of drew barrymore.
07.17.08 at 7:42 am
wtf was that shit after the kid says “can we do this later?” but right before the TV carnage words
07.17.08 at 10:14 am
showcase, lol
07.18.08 at 3:16 am
‘Tis indeed from Altered States! I love the scene where the end of Aha’s “Take On Me” video makes an unexpected cameo: http://youtube.com/watch?v=KpW1O8iOTqE
07.18.08 at 1:58 pm
“where can a guy get an isolation tank nowadays?”
Dude was way ahead of y’all.
07.19.08 at 8:01 pm
Hey I know that scene! It’s from Apocalypse Now. It’s this weird old movie about Vietnam and acid or something. Seriously hasn’t everybody seen Altered States? Oh you’re 16, my bad.
07.24.08 at 1:49 pm
Altered States is the shit. I too remember the days of having to watch scrambled Playboy channel, I think I liked that better than the internet. More imagination, less double fisting.
07.24.08 at 2:21 pm
Oh God… Blair Brown, the Thinking Main’s Bombshell. Better yet, the Thinking Man’s Wet Dream.
07.24.08 at 2:48 pm
Television is not the truth. Television is a goddamned amusement park.
07.25.08 at 12:22 pm