OUR FAVORITE, MOST USELESS, HORROR MOVIE DEVICES: #5


Horror movies are NOTHING without mysterious fat broads. They are usually silent, not unlike the one depicted here, they often look like the an Italian woman over fifty who just let herself go (Alfred Hitchcock),they are always in the middle of freaky behavior such as like aggressively sniffing something or staring real-hard-like at someone or just being fat in a chair with a really shiny piece of metal. In turn, whoever encounters fatso in the film stares back at her, shakes their head and walks the fatty off.
This is why we at STREET CARNAGE salute the “WEIRD SILENT ITALIAN LOOKING FAT BROAD” as our 5th favorite, useless device in Horrors and our 3rd favorite useful device in Romantic Comedies.

** The “Gay child standing behind a chair” device was number six on the list so you just got a “double shot”of useless, freaky!



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7 Comments

  1. friggen Says:

    HA HA HA! What the FRIG! is that kid doing? Fat silent old men are also a staple.

  2. egad Says:

    Oh man! I was hoping that it was this clip, and then it was
    Oh man oh man!

  3. Chachi and the Ashley Tisdales Says:

    I thought she was about to shead a tear after seeing someone litter.

  4. Narom Says:

    Oh please help what movie/music is that? So close.

  5. damnDanMan Says:

    Narom = noob

  6. Cotton Crown Says:

    The soundtrack is by goblin, from the Dario A’rgento flick Susperia

  7. Eli! Says:

    Oops - it’s Dario Argento - no bonus points for extra squiggles!

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July 3, 2009 12:00 pm


This person is going to chew you up and puke you out but you’re not a man until you’ve: had your heart broken, broken a heart, had the shit beaten out of you, and beaten the shit out of someone, so you might as well get this first part over with.

★★★★★★★★☆☆

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July 3, 2009 4:31 am


Are the words “J.A.P.s in July” in any Broadway songs about how great New York is? They should be.

★★★★★★★½☆☆

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